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The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - Why Won't People Listen to Brian Regan???

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Displaying 1-25 of 26 messages in this thread.
Posted ByDiscussion Topic: Why Won't People Listen to Brian Regan???
IAmMighty
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:23 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Sep. 00
U.S. Couple Sues Over Flaming Pop-Tart

PHILADELPHIA (Reuters) - The popular breakfast pastry Pop-Tarts has become a burning legal issue in New Jersey.

The Philadelphia Inquirer reported on Saturday that a New Jersey couple are suing the Kellogg Co. for $100,000 in damages caused to their home when an unattended Pop-Tart allegedly burst into flames inside their toaster.

Brenda Hurff of Washington Township put a cherry Pop-Tart in the toaster and left the house to drive her children to preschool, the newspaper said. When she returned 10 to 20 minutes later, smoke was pouring from the home and firefighters were already on the scene.

``I never thought a Pop-Tart could turn into a blowtorch,'' Hurff's attorney, Mauro Casci, told the newspaper. ``Did it pop? Did it not pop? Who knows?''

The local fire company listed the cause of the blaze as ''unattended food.''

A Kellogg spokesman declined to comment on the lawsuit but told the Inquirer that the cereal maker's products were safe and do not cause fires.

Pop-Tarts, which are filled with fruit preserves, carry a warning on the box advising customers not to leave the toaster unattended due to a possible risk of fire.

The lawsuit, filed this week in Gloucester County Superior Court by Hurff and her husband, also named toaster-maker Black & Decker Corp. as a defendant. The newspaper said the appliance maker had no comment on the suit.

In 1995, Kellogg paid $2,400 to a Springfield, Ohio, man who said that a fire started from a Pop-Tart had damaged his home, the Inquirer said.

The man's lawyer had considered calling as a witness humorist Dave Barry, who had written two years earlier that he caused a pair of strawberry Pop-Tarts to ignite by putting them into a toaster and holding the lever down for six minutes, the newspaper said.

---

That yummy goodness is just too good.

This couple has kids...breeding rights should be taken away.



"Stared at the Mendi Gossamer for too long!"
Snoteater
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:28 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Apr. 01
quote:

Brenda Hurff of Washington Township put a cherry Pop-Tart in the toaster and left the house to drive her children to preschool, the newspaper said. When she returned 10 to 20 minutes later, smoke was pouring from the home and firefighters were already on the scene.



How stupid do you have to be to leave anything cooking when you leave your house for any period of time. It's time to take these people out of the gene pool.

"I won't be active in the day to day operations of the club at all." --George Steinbrenner 1973.
IkeaBoy
P.L.F.
Portugese Liberation Front- Liberating Status' everywhere from the Tyranny of Portugal
I will die a traitor's death
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:28 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Sep. 00
They didn't follow directions. Holy Crist, they didn't follow directions.

The narrator in Fight Club is the man we will be, Patrick Bateman in American Psycho is
the man we want to be
Eliza Dushku- Hotter Than
Britney

JohnSlack
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:30 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: May. 01
Thats the problem with society today..we protect the idiots from removing themselves from the gene pool. Thats why there are so many problems. Like people need a warning 'coffee is hot, don't put it between your legs' or 'shit in the toaster can catch fire' are people really this dumb?

"Just think how dumb the average person is. Now realize that half of them are dumber then that!"
-George Carlin


For example: Kindest Regards, Your Name
fbdlingfrg
wow, my name looks odd without 5 lines of type below it in bold and purple and red
G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
Red Wings Captain Cecil
JBA~Remove the Pick & Click NOW!
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:32 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
if they would have just microwaved it on high for 3 seconds this wouldnt have happened



last time, the insects got me, but

This is the song that doesn’t end, yes it goes on and on my friend. Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was, but they’ll continue singing it forever just because this is the song that doesn’t end yes it goes on and on my friend. Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was, but they’ll continue singing it forever just because this is the song that doesn’t end yes it goes on and on my friend. Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was, but they’ll continue singing it forever just because this is the song that doesn’t end yes it goes on and on my friend. Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was, but they’ll continue singing it forever just because
IAmMighty
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:34 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Sep. 00
quote:

"Just think how dumb the average person is. Now realize that half of them are dumber then that!"
-George Carlin



JohnSlack that's a great quote.


"Stared at the Mendi Gossamer for too long!"
IkeaBoy
P.L.F.
Portugese Liberation Front- Liberating Status' everywhere from the Tyranny of Portugal
I will die a traitor's death
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:35 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Sep. 00
So true John. They make it too easy to live and too hard to die.

The narrator in Fight Club is the man we will be, Patrick Bateman in American Psycho is
the man we want to be
Eliza Dushku- Hotter Than
Britney

whichwaymediumorrare
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:35 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Apr. 01
thats funny because it aint me.those people are tools.


GRADUATED FROM THE HEADHUNTING SCHOOL OF FILZY
Doc Smith
I Love Anthony Zinni
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:40 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Sep. 00
Argh, I love how it is now the job of coroporations to protect us from ourselves.

You are using something in your house which heats up to a few hundred degrees (yeah, the heater elements in toasters get that hot) so you decide to leave while it is on. You do not deserve to be in the same gene pool with the rest of humanity.
If hate were people, I'd be China


I can levitate birds.
No one cares.
BallsackTeabagger
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:47 PM      
Hanger-On
Registered: Jul. 01

We have to be licensed in order to:
- drive
- cut hair
- fish

But anybody can have children.




TeenWeek
what's a status?
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:53 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
This person is a FUCKING STUPID IDIOT!!!

This is funny. There are actual instructions on how a pop tart can become a blow torch.

How to make a Pop-Tart Blow Torch

Arthur Dent
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 12:59 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Nov. 00
I picture a mandatory test for all High School seniors. Put the person in a sealed room. One wall is covered with buttons, switches, and knobs. All they have to do is follow written instructions on the wall. Follow them correctly and a door opens and you go home. Don't follow the instructions, and the room fills with poisonous gas and you die. And the instructions will be REALLY easy. Like push red button once. Flip green switch twice.

src="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/OAComSigPics/files/Arthur%20Dent%27s%20Sig/Dent-Sig3b.GIF">
An intelligent man is
sometimes forced to be drunk
to spend time with fools.
--Ernest Hemingway
"I don't read books, but I
have friends who do."
-Presidential Candidate George
W. Bush
"I get to go to lots of
overseas places, like Canada."
- Britney Spears


o&aswallow
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 1:08 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Jan. 01
Quit being pussies and eat your pop-tarts cold, right out of the package!


o&aswallow Recognized His Destiny Early.
Too Many Hotties, Not Enough Horny Goat Weed

Now accepting foster children applications. Cash only, no checks.
Email at [email protected]

Frat Guy has rented one of the foster bedrooms as of 7/21. Yes ladies, another college boy is in town for you to ravage.

It at first you don't succeed, keep on sucking till you do suck seed. - Curly Howard.

Pennsylvania resident, but original NYC listener.
IkeaBoy
P.L.F.
Portugese Liberation Front- Liberating Status' everywhere from the Tyranny of Portugal
I will die a traitor's death
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 1:10 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Sep. 00
Dent- that test is wrong and will never happen because prejudice against ANY group is bad and ...

a) It's prejudiced against people who can't control their hands.
b) It's prejudiced against illiterate people. Just because they're in high school doesn't mean they can read. And just because they can't read doesn't make them a bad people it just means that they they've never been loved or had a caring teacher.
c) it's prejudiced against people who can't stand to reach the buttons be them paralyzed or just short.
d) It's prejudiced against people who are colorblind
e) it's prejudiced against those who are too weak to push a button or pull a lever.
and f) We live in a country where no one should die since everyone is great and perect and has WONDERFUL things to offer this society. Death has to be bad because we never fully use these people's potential (just like how they should all go to college).

For some reason this conversation reminded me of a statistic that I read regarding how Standardized tests are biased towards ethnic group so a test was devised to see how people in different regions analyze things and they ask people in inner cities the definition for the word DUST and 60% of them defined dust as a drug and I mean seriously, it's DUST if you don't know what DUST is and need to revert to a slang term then yes, you are fundamentally stupid.

"The big hot fiery one is my house!"

The narrator in Fight Club is the man we will be, Patrick Bateman in American Psycho is
the man we want to be
Eliza Dushku- Hotter Than
Britney



This message was edited by IkeaBoy on 7-30-01 @ 1:19 PM
BallsackTeabagger
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 1:12 PM      
Hanger-On
Registered: Jul. 01
quote:

Quit being pussies and eat your pop-tarts cold, right out of the package!


[Brian Regan voice] HUH!?!? WHAT? Now I'm confused, cause the box says TOAST 'EM. It's says it on the pack-age. You gotta TOAST 'EM[/Brian Regan voice]

Black Lazerus
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 1:13 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: May. 01
To bad she didn't put one in then go to sleep so all those Idiots could have burned in the flames
like i want their kids running around later on breeding.

::looks around:: "What?"

"He who knows when he can fight and when he cannot will be victorious.
He who understands how to fight in accordance with the strength of antagonistic forces will be victorious.
He whose ranks are united in purpose will be victorious.
He who is well prepared and lies in wait for an enemy who is not well prepared will be victorious. "!!


6:00am another chick in the house,
6:15 another chick kicked her out ,
Spent one minute trying to dig her out,
the other 14 tried put it in her mouth.

Cap'n Fudge
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 1:17 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
Can the mother bathe herself? She's clearly rocket scientist, because feeding small children Pop Tarts is like giving them a kilo of blow.

But she's smart enough to realize that she should sue someone, because, really, when you think about it for a long long long time, up to the point when yourears hurt, she's really not to blame.

Ponderous, effing ponderous.

I hate this job! I hate this goddamn job and I don't need it!!!

[email protected]

People say that I neglect my responsibilities
But I don't mind cause I'll live longer.

Need Adoption??? Now accepting applications for the crew.

Arthur Dent
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 3:14 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Nov. 00
I'm suing Ikeaboy for the mental anguish of telling me I'm wrong.

src="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/OAComSigPics/files/Arthur%20Dent%27s%20Sig/Dent-Sig3b.GIF">
An intelligent man is
sometimes forced to be drunk
to spend time with fools.
--Ernest Hemingway
"I don't read books, but I
have friends who do."
-Presidential Candidate George
W. Bush
"I get to go to lots of
overseas places, like Canada."
- Britney Spears


SeeYouNextTuesday
G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
Elite Ninja Gaiden Infiltration Unit
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 3:31 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Feb. 01
quote:

she's really not to blame.



YES SHE IS!! At some point people need to take responsibility for their own idiocy. Anyone with any life experience knows not to leave the oven or anything like that on and leave. And how much of a hurry are you that you cant wait 90 seconds for your pop tarts to toast?

And remember that girl that called in to Ron and Fez who was babysitting when the kids put some pop tarts in the microwave for five minutes? STUPID! A piece of chicken 5 times as large as two pop tarts doesnt take 5 minutes.

Me, sometimes I take a risk and put my pop tarts in the microwave for 5 or 7 seconds,... but i stand there and watch it.

In conclusion, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGHHHH!




----------------------------
"I know I'm homophobic, but not about gay guys; they don't bother me at all. It's straight guys who don't know they're gay -- they fuck my shit right up."
-- King Missile - "Gay, not gay"

DUTY FREE MEGA-MARKET, PORT BRASTA, ALPHA CENTAURI. BE LIKE THE TWENTY-SECOND ELEPHANT WITH HEATED VALUE IN SPACE -- BARK!

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Shelle Bink
True star of the celebrity softball game: the redhead in section 101.
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 3:48 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Jul. 01
[brian regan] gonna gonna..... get a Pop-Tart.... stick it in the toaster.... then run away... jump on the hump[/brian regan]


Don't Even Bother Asking To Adopt Me...I Know My Way Around Here
Cap'n Fudge
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 5:29 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
Maybe I needed to put [sarcasm] around my post.

I hate this job! I hate this goddamn job and I don't need it!!!

[email protected]

People say that I neglect my responsibilities
But I don't mind cause I'll live longer.

Need Adoption??? Now accepting applications for the crew.

Spork
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 9:18 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jun. 01
Maybe Kelloggs can countersue?

There has been information out there for years regarding the clever pop-tarts' alternative uses.

Take a peek:

Visit this Website

also...

Visit this Website

Now don't you go getting any ideas out there you crazy kids...




"Look how hot they're getting. And that's an old picture," Anthony says.
Cunt-Twat
No real… its cool to wear childrens Band-Aids.
I'm not a Cockblocker, I'm a COCKSUCKER!
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 9:35 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Jan. 01
does no one else find it wierd that she put the pop tarts in the toaster, then took the kids to school. was she c-teasing the kids with a pop tart that was for her?? what an f'n twat.

METS IN 2002!!

thanks FN MORON...you know why
Claire
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 10:44 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Feb. 01
quote:

A Kellogg spokesman declined to comment on the lawsuit but told the Inquirer that the cereal maker's products were safe and do not cause fires.



Well THAT'S a relief. No more exploding baked goods nightmares for me :)


"And wow! Hey! What's this thing coming towards me very fast? Very very fast. So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide sounding word like... ow... ound... round... ground! That's it! That's a good name - ground!
I wonder if it will be friends with me?"

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff." - singer Mariah Carey.
IkeaBoy
P.L.F.
Portugese Liberation Front- Liberating Status' everywhere from the Tyranny of Portugal
I will die a traitor's death
posted on 07-30-2001 @ 11:22 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Sep. 00
quote:

A Kellogg spokesman declined to comment on the lawsuit but told the Inquirer that the cereal maker's products were safe and do not cause fires.
That's not true. I saw an episode of The Simpsons once where Homer was making donuts for Mr. Burns and they burst into flames.

The narrator in Fight Club is the man we will be, Patrick Bateman in American Psycho is
the man we want to be
Eliza Dushku- Hotter Than
Britney



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Displaying 1-25 of 26 messages in this thread.