The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - How bout most offensive joke?

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The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - How bout most offensive joke?

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Displaying 1-25 of 36 messages in this thread.

Posted By	Discussion Topic: How bout most offensive joke?
Fast Freddy Voted Most Likey to ~~Suck Weed!~~ be a fucking retarded douchebag! The next old thread I bring up officially starts the mods in a race to ban me. Flock wins!	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 10:19 AM
Psychopath Registered: Mar. 02	Whats the best thing about fucking a 12 year old girl? Flip her over and you get a 12 year old boy! Huddla Huddla

RonRon5477	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 10:33 AM
Psychopath Registered: Apr. 01	5 gay guys in a room. Who farted?? The guy on the end. "I wish I could say something classy and inspirational, but that just wouldn't be our style. Pain heals. Chicks dig scars. Glory... lasts forever." -Shane Falco in The Replacements Want to use the O&A EZPass lane? here's how (only for NY listeners, sorry to everyone else): The URL is: "http://oarule.homestead.com/files/OA"+previous phone screener before Stinky+previous phone screener's girlfriend's REAL* name+".html" AIM: RonRon5477*

Mike Rotch	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 11:51 AM
Psychopath Registered: Apr. 01	Q: How do you make an 8 year old girl cry twice? A: Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear. [crickets]What? Too far?[/crickets] Beliefs are dangerous. Beliefs allow the mind to stop functioning. A non-functining mind is Clinically dead. Believe in nothing...

Norton's Victim	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 11:53 AM
Psychopath Registered: Jan. 02	So last night I was fucking this girl in the ass and she turned around and said "You're a pedophile". And I said, "Whoa, that's a pretty big word for an 8 year old". â€œThe window burns to light the way back home. A light that warms no matter where they've gone. They're off to find the hero of the day. But what if they should fall by someone's wicked way. Still the window burns. Time so slowly turns. And someone there is sighing. Keepers of the flames. Do ya feel your name? Can't you hear your babies crying? Mama they try and break me. Still they try and break me. 'Scuze me while I tend to how I feel. These things return to me that still seem real. Now deservingly this easy chair. But the rocking stopped by wheels of despair. Don't want your aid. But the first I've make. For years can't hold or feel. No, I'm not all me. So please excuse me. While I tend to how I feel. But now the dreams and waking screams. That ever last the night. So build the wall, behind the crawl. And hide until it's light. So can you hear your babies cryin' now? Still the window burns. Time so slowly turns. And someone there is sighing. Keepers of the flames. Do ya feel your name? Can't you hear your babies crying?â€ - Metallica "Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of liberty." - John F. Kennedy, 1961

av8er OA.com's taint with wings. The only person to have a 20 double post	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 12:02 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00	notice how everyone goes right for the pedophile jokes.....interesting... Av8er Radio [AIM]Â [ICQ]Â [E-Mail] Let's take a blast to the moon baby I sit around wishing you well How I'm craving you, yeah! Every time I'm near you I always wanna swallow you down I'll be right here if ya' need me In my life, I'll need you here, don't ask why I'll never disappear Why is it everyday that I feel the pain? Let's take a trip to the stars far away Where were you when I was down? Staring into the dead My pain is caused by my pleasure My soul mate lives in your body I can't get you out of my head It never goes away In my life, I'll need you here, don't ask why I'll never disappear In your eyes you can bid me farewell But don't ever try to understand the situation Why is it everyday that I feel the pain?

mulligan FTP....what's an FTP? Do I know you? Are you currently employed by Infinity Broadcasting or the FBI?	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 12:08 PM
Psychopath Registered: Mar. 01	A girl is watching her father shower. She points to his penis and says, "Daddy, when will I get one of those?" He looks at his watch and says, "When your mother leaves for work!"

av8er OA.com's taint with wings. The only person to have a 20 double post	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 12:10 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00	He wears his watch in the shower? Av8er Radio [AIM]Â [ICQ]Â [E-Mail] Let's take a blast to the moon baby I sit around wishing you well How I'm craving you, yeah! Every time I'm near you I always wanna swallow you down I'll be right here if ya' need me In my life, I'll need you here, don't ask why I'll never disappear Why is it everyday that I feel the pain? Let's take a trip to the stars far away Where were you when I was down? Staring into the dead My pain is caused by my pleasure My soul mate lives in your body I can't get you out of my head It never goes away In my life, I'll need you here, don't ask why I'll never disappear In your eyes you can bid me farewell But don't ever try to understand the situation Why is it everyday that I feel the pain?

mulligan FTP....what's an FTP? Do I know you? Are you currently employed by Infinity Broadcasting or the FBI?	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 12:12 PM
Psychopath Registered: Mar. 01	quote: He wears his watch in the shower? Work with me here - The point is as soon as Mommy leaves the house he is going to poor the coal to her Crinkle Crinkle This message was edited by mulligan on 3-13-02 @ 12:13 PM

av8er OA.com's taint with wings. The only person to have a 20 double post	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 12:15 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00	A mother & young daughter are walking through the park, they come across a couple of dogs fucking. The daughter says "mommy, what are they doing?". The mother replies "they're baking a cake sweetie." The daughter accepts the answer and they go home. The next morning the daughter comes into the kitchen and says "mommy, I know you and daddy baked a cake in the living room last night." the mother replies "how do you know that sweetie?" she says "because I licked the icing off the couch." Av8er Radio [AIM]Â [ICQ]Â [E-Mail] Let's take a blast to the moon baby I sit around wishing you well How I'm craving you, yeah! Every time I'm near you I always wanna swallow you down I'll be right here if ya' need me In my life, I'll need you here, don't ask why I'll never disappear Why is it everyday that I feel the pain? Let's take a trip to the stars far away Where were you when I was down? Staring into the dead My pain is caused by my pleasure My soul mate lives in your body I can't get you out of my head It never goes away In my life, I'll need you here, don't ask why I'll never disappear In your eyes you can bid me farewell But don't ever try to understand the situation Why is it everyday that I feel the pain?

RonRon5477	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 12:16 PM
Psychopath Registered: Apr. 01	quote: notice how everyone goes right for the pedophile jokes.....interesting... Hey, I didn't. I was trying to get this thread to go in several other directions. "I wish I could say something classy and inspirational, but that just wouldn't be our style. Pain heals. Chicks dig scars. Glory... lasts forever." -Shane Falco in The Replacements Want to use the O&A EZPass lane? here's how (only for NY listeners, sorry to everyone else): The URL is: "http://oarule.homestead.com/files/OA"+previous phone screener before Stinky+previous phone screener's girlfriend's REAL* name+".html" AIM: RonRon5477*

-GomeZ-	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 12:21 PM
Psychopath Registered: Jan. 02	Guy takes his wife to the Doctor... The Doc says, "Well, it's either Alzheimers disease or AIDS." "What do you mean?" The guy says, "You can't tell the difference?" "Yeah, the two look a lot alike in the early stages... Tell you what.. Drive her way out into the country, kick her out of the car, and if she finds her way back, don't fuck her." Schooling people, one post at a time

-GomeZ-	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 12:22 PM
Psychopath Registered: Jan. 02	I remembered a second one Do you know what a Jewish dilemma is? Free ham. Schooling people, one post at a time

CarsonOGin Froy seems ok, Faceman is fair. But Slash is a cunt, FTL is a total soccer mom, JoeyBigArms thinks he's a fucking message board god.	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 1:48 PM
Psychopath Registered: Dec. 01	Here's my entry, I made it myself. Not a classic setup punchline joke but, a visual one.

GRABMYJUNK	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 2:01 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01	Why would you wrap a gerbil with duct tape? So it won't explode when you fuck it! "Remember, where-ever you go...there you are." "Ratshit! Batshit! Dirty old Twat! 69 Assholes Tied in a Knot! Chickenshit! Fuck-Up!"-George Carlin

OAAWITE	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 2:06 PM
Hanger-On Registered: Jan. 70	What's the difference between Magic Johnson and a cantaloupe? Cantaloupes don't have AIDS. New Poster with a question? Reach me through ICQ Remembering; YellowDiscipline This message was edited by OAAWITE on 3-13-02 @ 2:11 PM

dubinsk	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 2:14 PM
Hanger-On Registered: Jan. 01	Q: what do you do after you rape a 12 year old blind/deaf/dumb girl? A: Break her fingers so she can't tell her mom Q: What is 18" long, hard as a rock, and makes a woman scream everytime? A: Crib Death Q: How do you make a dead baby float? A: 2 scoops dead baby,2 scoops ice cream, i can root beer Q: whats small, red, and can't turn corners? A: A Baby w/ a javelin stuck in its head Q: Whats teh difference between a baby and a trampoline? A: You take ur boots of b4 you jump on a trampoline "these grits are off the hook yo!"

GRABMYJUNK	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 2:16 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01	What's worse than a truckfull of dead babies? a live one on the bottom eating its way up! -How do you unload a truckfull of dead babies? With a pitchfork! What's red and sits in the corner? ababy sucking on a Razor! What's green and sits in the corner? The same baby a month later! Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken! "Remember, where-ever you go...there you are." "Ratshit! Batshit! Dirty old Twat! 69 Assholes Tied in a Knot! Chickenshit! Fuck-Up!"-George Carlin

GRABMYJUNK	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 2:56 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01	Q: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? A: Nothing! She's been told twice already! Q: What does a woman do when she returns from the battered women's shelter? A: The Fucking dishes if she knows what's good for her! "Remember, where-ever you go...there you are." "Ratshit! Batshit! Dirty old Twat! 69 Assholes Tied in a Knot! Chickenshit! Fuck-Up!"-George Carlin

Rookie Have you ever seen a grown man naked? Stature of an Oompa Loompa! JBA's Stalker. Post Whore One Week, Fart In The Wind The Next	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 3:39 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01	When is it ok to spit in an Italian girl's face? When her mustache is on fire... ON YOUR KNEES, BITCHES!!!!!!

GRABMYJUNK	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 3:57 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01	you have a nig, a spic, and a wop in a car(waddle doodle), who's driving? The police officer! What's the best thing about having sex with a baby? People expect babies to scream. "Remember, where-ever you go...there you are." "Ratshit! Batshit! Dirty old Twat! 69 Assholes Tied in a Knot! Chickenshit! Fuck-Up!"-George Carlin This message was edited by GRABMYJUNK on 3-13-02 @ 4:01 PM

Senor_Doobie	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 4:14 PM
Hanger-On Registered: Oct. 00	A woman gives birth in a hospital. The nurse comes into the room holding her baby. The nurse drops the baby onto the floor and kicks it accross the room. Then she picks the baby up and bangs its head into the wall a few times. The shocked mother yells "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY BABY??" The nurse replies,"April Fools. It was already dead." What does it all mean?

handcock	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 5:01 PM
Psychopath Registered: Feb. 02	What's red and crawls up your leg? A Homesick abortion. Why did God create women? To carry semen to the bathroom. Why do women fake orgasms? They think we give a shit. What's the best thing about fucking a 12 yr old? You can push her hair back in the shower and she looks 8. What's the best thing about fucking a 4 year old? Listening to her pelvis snap. A man walks into the roughest saloon in town and buys a beer. He asks for the roughest hooker in there. The bartender takes him upstairs and opens the third door on the right. The guy walks in and the lady in the room stands up, turns around and bends over. The man asks her "How do you know I want to do that?". The woman retorts, "I don't, I just thought you might want to open your beer". "Every once in a while, when I think that I've had too much to drink, I realize that it's just the alchohol talking"

Suzie I was supposed to have a status, but some FNMoron forgot what it was supposed to be.	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 5:19 PM
Psychopath Registered: Aug. 00	What do you call the piece of skin around the vagina? A woman. ------------------ Even sunshine burns if you get too much.

ClusterF@#$	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 5:41 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01	pedophile? I take offense to the word pedophile.. i've always thought of it more along the lines of young at heart. Message to those concerned with my smoking habit.... mamma didn't raise no quitter.

GRABMYJUNK	posted on 03-13-2002 @ 5:59 PM
O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01	How does a guy know if a woman achieves orgasm? A: Yeah, like he cares! "Remember, where-ever you go...there you are." "Ratshit! Batshit! Dirty old Twat! 69 Assholes Tied in a Knot! Chickenshit! Fuck-Up!"-George Carlin

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Displaying 1-25 of 36 messages in this thread.