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The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - You Know You're a New Yorker if:


Displaying 1-8 of 8 messages in this thread.
Posted ByDiscussion Topic: You Know You're a New Yorker if:
TeenWeek
what's a status? 		posted on 07-12-2001 @ 12:38 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
Sometimes you get an e-mail joke or list or something that is funny. I thought this would be interesting to the board since most of us are from the NY area. Please feel free to add to this list.

1. You say "The City" and expect everyone to know that this means Manhattan.

2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.

3. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park at 3:30 on the Friday before a long weekend,but
can't find Wisconsin on a map.

4. Hookers and the homeless are invisible to you.

5. The subway map makes sense to you.

6. You think the subway should never be called
anything prissy, like the Metro.

7. You believe that being able to swear at people in
> their own language
> makes
> you bilingual.
>
> 8. You've considered smacking someone just for saying
> "The Big Apple."
>
> 9. Your door has more than two locks.
>
> 10. The most frequently used part of your car is the
> horn.
>
> 11. You consider eye contact an act of overt
> aggression.
>
> 12. You call an 8' x 10' plot of patchy grass a yard.
>
> 13. You consider Westchester "Upstate."
>
> 14. You cried the day Ed Koch took over for Judge
> Wapner.
>
> 15. You walk faster than some people run.
>
> 16. You see nothing odd about the speed of an
> auctioneer's speaking.
>
> 17. You're paying $1,200 for a studio the size of a
> walk-in closet and you
> think it's a "steal."
>
> 18. You've been to New Jersey twice and got lost both
> times.
>
> 19. You pay more each month to insure your car than
> most people in the US
> pay
> in rent.
>
> 20. You haven't seen more than twelve stars in the
> night sky since you went
> away to camp as a kid.
>
> 21. You go to dinner at 9pm and head out to the clubs
> when most Americans
> are
> heading to bed.
>
> 22. Your closet is filled with black clothes.
>
> 23. When foreigners ask directions, you are nice to
> them. When other New
> Yorkers ask directions, you ignore them.
>
> 24. You pay $5 without blinking for a beer that cost
> the bar 28 cents.
>
> 25. You take fashion seriously.
>
> 26. When you pass a celebrity on the street, you don't
> go to pieces.
>
> 27. You have 27 different menus next to your
> telephone.
>
> 28. Going to Brooklyn is considered a "road trip."
>
> 29. America west of the Hudson is still theoretical to
> you.
>
> 30. You've stopped thinking about how many hands
> touched the subway pole.
>
> 31. You're suspicious of strangers who are actually
> nice to you.
>
> 32. You haven't cooked a meal since helping Mom last
> Thanksgiving.
>
> 33. You take a taxi to get to your health club to
> exercise.
>
> 34. Your idea of "personal space" is no one actually
> breathing on you.
>
> 35. $50 worth of groceries fit in one paper bag.
>
> 36. You have a minimum of five "worst cab ride ever"
> stories.
>
> 37. You don't hear sirens anymore.
>
> 38. You've mentally blocked out all thoughts of the
> city's air quality and
> what
> it's doing to your lungs.
>
> 39. You live/work in a building with a larger
> population than some American
> towns.
>
> 40. Your doorman is Russian, your grocer is Korean, your deli man is Israeli, your building super is Italian, your laundry guy is Chinese, your favorite bartender is Irish, your favorite diner owner is
Greek, the watch seller on your corner is Senegalese, your last cabbie was Pakistani, your newsstand guy is Indian and your favorite falafel guy is Egyptian.





This message was edited by TeenWeek on 7-12-01 @ 12:45 PM
heyladiladi
STONER
ON THE SNUKA CBH ROTISSERIE 		posted on 07-12-2001 @ 12:53 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: May. 01
quote:
18. You've been to New Jersey twice and got lost both times.
These drivers are easy to pick out. They are the ones 2 inches from each others' bumpers. They seem to think if anyone gets in front of them, they will be lost again.




We won't pretend that this is the end
We're not losers all of the time
We march and we fall, we're one and for all
It's just evil all of the time, all of the time
We are the Fiend Club We are the Fiend Club

I've been searching for the daughter of the devil himself
I've been searching for an angel in white
I've been waiting for a woman who's a little of both
And I can feel her but she's nowhere In sight
darthziggy
Isles fan for life		posted on 07-12-2001 @ 1:44 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Aug. 00
that's hysterical - and very very true.
one more to add:
you need some background noise to help you fall asleep when not in the city. at least, that's the case w/ me most times.
and my mom is a perfect example of the using the horn one.


darthziggy@opieanthony.com
My unofficial adopted newbie: devil's a-hole, when he decides to post that is
LET'S GO ISLANDERS
HOSPITALIANO
posted on 07-12-2001 @ 3:28 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
When someone says Borough, you don't think of a donkey.


What Would Jesus Do? He died so the rest of us could have a better life. Why don't you go and follow his lead.
"You have to commit to the stupidity"-Adam Ferrara, star of "The Job" and Olive Garden Commercials
Star of Pleasure Production's Adult Feature "The Unlucky Guy" Now availabile on DVD at finer adult establishments near you.
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There are still two place settings available at my table and remember, all the free breadsticks and salad you can eat.


WoundedAngel
Absolutely spectacular, and 1337 as hell.		posted on 07-12-2001 @ 3:30 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jan. 01
Wow, pretty funny. I'd have to say that 75% of those applied to me(including the Jersey one). And Darth, I also have no problem falling asleep with background noise. I even fell asleep in front of speakers at a concert twice!


Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!		posted on 07-12-2001 @ 9:23 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
quote:
13. You consider Westchester "Upstate"

Hey I dont live upstate


ACCEPTING ADOPTION APPLICATIONS CLICK BELOW
E-Mail Me
1 Tequila, 2 Tequila, 3 Tequila floor
E-Mail Me
AOL/AIM - oanda1027fm
FUCK YOU CYCLOPS

I have adopted "I Rooned It" any problems let me know
darthziggy
Isles fan for life		posted on 07-12-2001 @ 9:39 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Aug. 00
tequila, actually, we do. and angel, that's what i meant, that we can sleep w/ background noise and sometimes we actually NEED in order to fall asleep.
and another that applies to me is the walking faster than most people run thing. i'm like lightning when i walk alone for some reason.


darthziggy@opieanthony.com
My unofficial adopted newbie: devil's a-hole, when he decides to post that is
LET'S GO ISLANDERS
Meatbus
posted on 07-13-2001 @ 12:24 AM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jun. 01
Hilarious TeenWeek. Especially #40. I live on the Island and always have, but I can still relate to every one.


>41. You've grown so accustomed to the stench of urine, you almost find it pleasant.


BTW: I often fall asleep to the raucous combination of heavy metal and fire sirens. It's amazing what people can get used to.





"How 'bout a little less asking questions, and a little more shut the hell up?"



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