10-08-2003, 05:31 PM
(AP)(Sacramento, CA) Anthony Cumia, Shock Jock for the
critically acclaimed Opie & Anthony Radio Show, was elected
Governor of California last night by huge margin. Anthony
trounced incumbent Governor Gray Davis and the popular challenger Arnold Schwarzenegger. Cumia, speaking from campaign headquarters at the ballroom of the famous Mars Hotel in San Francisco, claimed victory just after the polls closed. “Free f%$kin’ drinks for everybody!†became a frequent victory chant. “I love America. I’m not even a f$#in’ resident of this state, and now I’m the governor.†Cumia quieted the crowd during his victory speech: “I received phone calls from Un-Governor Davis (“What the hell kind of a name is Gray anyway? It’s a dull color and he’s a dull guy.â€) and Non-Governor Schwarzenegger (“The only Arnold I ever liked was the pig.â€) who conceded the election, but that Gary Coleman is a twerp and challenged me to a fight.â€
Guests Jim Norton, Jim Bruer and Jay Mohr performed a rousing victory set that lasted
until 6AM (when the Jack Daniels ran out). The group
was joined on stage by Warren Zevon and Johnny Cash
for an amazing version of “Ring of Fire†(this report
could not be confirmed since all witnesses were
responsible for the consumption of the JD).
Anthony vows to make the state a cool place to live. He
has appointed long time friend and partner Greg "Opie" Hughes as Secretary of
Fiction and Rick Delgato as Director of Communications. Delgato was not available for comment and is rumored to still be sedated and under a doctor’s care.
*EDIT-just for you Ronin,:kiss:
critically acclaimed Opie & Anthony Radio Show, was elected
Governor of California last night by huge margin. Anthony
trounced incumbent Governor Gray Davis and the popular challenger Arnold Schwarzenegger. Cumia, speaking from campaign headquarters at the ballroom of the famous Mars Hotel in San Francisco, claimed victory just after the polls closed. “Free f%$kin’ drinks for everybody!†became a frequent victory chant. “I love America. I’m not even a f$#in’ resident of this state, and now I’m the governor.†Cumia quieted the crowd during his victory speech: “I received phone calls from Un-Governor Davis (“What the hell kind of a name is Gray anyway? It’s a dull color and he’s a dull guy.â€) and Non-Governor Schwarzenegger (“The only Arnold I ever liked was the pig.â€) who conceded the election, but that Gary Coleman is a twerp and challenged me to a fight.â€
Guests Jim Norton, Jim Bruer and Jay Mohr performed a rousing victory set that lasted
until 6AM (when the Jack Daniels ran out). The group
was joined on stage by Warren Zevon and Johnny Cash
for an amazing version of “Ring of Fire†(this report
could not be confirmed since all witnesses were
responsible for the consumption of the JD).
Anthony vows to make the state a cool place to live. He
has appointed long time friend and partner Greg "Opie" Hughes as Secretary of
Fiction and Rick Delgato as Director of Communications. Delgato was not available for comment and is rumored to still be sedated and under a doctor’s care.
*EDIT-just for you Ronin,:kiss: