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Full Version: I'm not wearing any underwear
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I must have somehow put on dirty or otherwise contaminated underwear this morning.

I was sitting at my desk surrounded by this putrid odor until I realized that it had to be me.

I then realized that it was clearly the smell of ball sweat and swamp ass.

I then felt down under my grundle, and it was rubbing a puddle of water.

I had to walk into the bathroom, sit on the pot, and rip my underwear off (since I didn't want to take my shoes and pants all the way off.

And then I threw my ripped drawers into the trash (which is uncovered) so someone will clearly see (and likely smell) the rancid undies next to the bathroom sink while the wash their hands.

I also just sprayed my sweaty nuts with AXE body spray.
AXE? I thought you were a fancy pants. Get some Jean Paul Gauthier or Polo body spray. AXE is for sissies. If you were black, you'd have probably bought TAG instead....so at least it wasn't that.
just another guy fooled by those ridiculously unrealistic television commercials
What the fuck are you doing to make yourself so funky man? Christ. I could wear the same drawls for days and not get like that.
It was an accident. I don't wear dirty underwear. I must have been getting undressed and got distracted and put dirty underwear back in my drawer.

I only have AXE because when I started my new job, I realized I didn't have any toiletries in my office. So I walked across the stree to Duane Reade to buy deodorant, toothbrush, toothpaste, q tips, scissors, etc. Duane Reade doesnt' really have a selection of D&G fragrances.

All that stuff so that if I get to work and realize I missed something in the morning, I can fix it hopefully before other people realize.

But it's too late. I need to find a store to buy new underwear and pants.

I smell so bad right now. This mutant BO is taking over. The bad ball sweat I had in the morning, made me gamy and hot, and now it's progressing worse and worse.

I've gotta go to Century 21 for lunch and go shopping.
I just threw up my latte
I am totally going to switch my chair with the homo who sits next to me. at the end of the day.

He's going to love the smell of Santorum.
Galt Wrote:It was an accident. I don't wear dirty underwear. I must have been getting undressed and got distracted and put dirty underwear back in my drawer.

I only have AXE because when I started my new job, I realized I didn't have any toiletries in my office. So I walked across the stree to Duane Reade to buy deodorant, toothbrush, toothpaste, q tips, scissors, etc. Duane Reade doesnt' really have a selection of D&G fragrances.

All that stuff so that if I get to work and realize I missed something in the morning, I can fix it hopefully before other people realize.

But it's too late. I need to find a store to buy new underwear and pants.

I smell so bad right now. This mutant BO is taking over. The bad ball sweat I had in the morning, made me gamy and hot, and now it's progressing worse and worse.

I've gotta go to Century 21 for lunch and go shopping.

What the fuck do you do, where your panties for a fortnight to get them that funky?
There's a place called "the gym".
Galt Wrote:There's a place called "the gym".

Either youre a monster in the gym or you have a chemical imbalance.
Take a shower after working out, sporto.

Or you could use unscented wipes to clean your pits and whatnot.
What I dont understand is, if they were that rank, how did you not notice while putting them on?
it all makes sense now. galt went to work out, got home, undressed in front of a mirror, and is so in love with himself he got distracted by his reflection and put on his old underpants. All the clues are there they just had to be combined to form the events that occurred
Mad Wrote:Take a shower after working out, sporto.

Or you could use unscented wipes to clean your pits and whatnot.


the unscented wipes can be very helpful when you don't have time to shower at the gym.
two words...

skid marks
faceman802 Wrote:it all makes sense now. galt went to work out, got home, undressed in front of a mirror, and is so in love with himself he got distracted by his reflection and put on his old underpants. All the clues are there they just had to be combined to form the events that occurred

YOURE A GENIUS!
I don't know if it's from the gym.

What likely happened is that I got home, maybe right from work or from the gym and I was on the phone and got distracted as maybe I was also putting away clean clothes I got back from the dry cleaners and accidentally put dirty clothes in the drawer.

I don't have a full-length mirror, so staring at my beauty is impossible.
that Axe body spray shit is overpriced water.

Gold Bond medicated powder will take care of any funkiness issues you might have.
Gooch Wrote:
Mad Wrote:Take a shower after working out, sporto.

Or you could use unscented wipes to clean your pits and whatnot.


the unscented wipes can be very helpful when you don't have time to shower at the gym.

You are about 6 months away from washing yourself with a rag on a stick
Yall are some stinky motherfuckers. I dont care how hard I work out, I just do not get funky. Its a bonus during marathon sex sessions.
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