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$200 Gift Certificate To The Mall - Printable Version

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$200 Gift Certificate To The Mall - Hoon - 12-30-2006

So, my mother gave me a $200 gift certificate to the mall.
I don't need clothes. I have enough Van Husen dress shirts to last me a decade. I don't need jeans, coats, shoes, boots or cd's. I walked around the mall with my bride for three hours and couldn't find a single thing I wanted and the things I considered, my bride told me no. No to a shotgun from Dick's Sporting Goods, no to seasons 2, 3 and 4 of Curb Your Enthusiasm, no to an ipod because she say's I'll never use it and she's right and no to a sweet 19 volt cordless drill because I already have a 12 volt.

So, I left without getting anything. In this thread I'd like you to suggest something I could buy. Pretend YOU have a $200 gift certificate to the mall.

Thanks,
H.


- Gooch - 12-30-2006

i could spend $200 with ease.

i'd buy books. check a watch store. if anything, a Tommy Bahama hawiian shirt, some gadgets. the idea is to buy something thats cool...who the FUCK cares if you need the fuckin thing.


- Hoon - 12-30-2006

I don't read books. In order to do that I need complete silence and that is impossible at my house.

I don't wear watches because my wrists are ridiculously slim. I mean, they're downright feminine so a watch just looks silly.

I'm not a gadget guy.

I WANT to buy something cool but I don't want to buy something cool that's going to end up on my daughters playroom floor encased in playdough.


- Mad - 12-30-2006

First mistake was bring the old ball 'n chain with you shopping. Does she wipe your ass for you after you've dumped?


- Hoon - 12-31-2006

No. But if I don't listen I don't get any pussy and that my friend is like holding a royal flush.


- Charles Manson - 12-31-2006

Go to a dollar store and buy 200 items. I bet that would be fun.


- Hoon - 12-31-2006

Yes ma'am. I am seriously want to buy 300 tiny tubes of Crest toothpaste. YOU DEAL WITH ME NOW!!


- virgingrrl - 12-31-2006

books.
music.
bras and panties.
new bedding.
movies.
bags.

its easy to spend $200.

ps. your mom gave you a shitty gift, she took all the effort out of finding you something, and in turn you have now made us work for your gift also. boooo.


- Hoon - 12-31-2006

my mom did the best thing she could.
for after years of clearly fake reactions from me after opening garth brooks shirts, cheap cologne and faggoty man bracelets, she finally understood a gift certificate is the way to go.


- virgingrrl - 12-31-2006

what exactly is a faggoty man bracelet?


- Hoon - 12-31-2006

some sparkly silverish thing that looks like it belongs on an 80 year old jewish lady with bad taste.

i'm too much of a man to wear a bracelet in the first place. much less a gawdy one that shimmers.


- Keyser Soze - 12-31-2006

trade it in for one of these...

<img src="http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o171/cgull8m/bushbill1.jpg">


- Hoon - 12-31-2006

I CAN'T GET THAT AT THE MALL


- drusilla - 12-31-2006

head to sunglass hut for a pair of sunglasses. i treated myself to a pair of prada shields when i was in south beach over the summer. i'm quite happy with that purchase.

or put it towards a new flat screen tv for another room in the house.

if all else fails, give it to your wife & i'm sure she'll buy a pair of shoes, or a coat for herself. if you want, make her give you $200 bucks for it.

$200 bucks might cover a new set of sheets or two from calvin klein. the only bedding i've slept on for almost 10 years.


- Mad - 12-31-2006

Egyptian cotton 1000/1200 TC > Calvin Klein, Miss Fancy Pants.


- Keyser Soze - 12-31-2006

frette > everything else


- drusilla - 12-31-2006

its about the style, don't really give a crap about the egyptian cotton


- GonzoStyle - 12-31-2006

Mad Wrote:Egyptian cotton 1000/1200 TC > Calvin Klein, Miss Fancy Pants.

You wouldn't know Egyptian cotton if Pharaoh himself sent it to you, you knock-off wearing motherfucker.


- Gooch - 12-31-2006

he shoots coons and uses their skin.


- Mad - 12-31-2006

GonzoStyle Wrote:
Mad Wrote:Egyptian cotton 1000/1200 TC > Calvin Klein, Miss Fancy Pants.

You wouldn't know Egyptian cotton if Pharaoh himself sent it to you, you knock-off wearing motherfucker.

OK, Mr. Star Wars sheet using cunt.