12-12-2006, 03:07 AM
In the beginning of time there was a galactic kingdom in the Purple Galaxy. In this galaxy, everyone believed that you should have sex with everything. When religion was born, they brought with them the 7, who challenged everything the Purple people believed in. To combat this, the king of the purple galaxy sent David Bowie to Earth to protect it from Michael Jackson. After David Bowie made himself the duke of Earth, the king sent his son Prince to Earth to help David Bowie defeat the evil Michael Jackson and his naturally gifted, but untrained monkey assassin, Bubbles.
On his way to Earth, Prince's little red space corvette spun out of control and crash landed in the North Pole, where Santa took him in and took care of him. For the next 8,000 years, Prince thought he was one of Santa's elves. Prince thought he was strange because all the other elves wanted to do five year old things like eat cake and play with ribbons, and Prince wanted to 'do' everything that moved. After Prince seduced Mrs Santa, two elves, and a reindeer, Santa decided to tell Prince the truth. After discovering that he was an alien, Prince started a music career on Earth so he could have sex with women who wanted to be famous.
During this time he remembered his mission to destroy Michael Jackson. He went to the Neverland Ranch where Michael Jackson thought he was a child. Prince spent the next four weeks in hospital. In order to save his life the doctors turned Prince into a crime fighting cyborg. It was during this time that Prince played the lead role in Robocop 2.
Thinking that he was no longer a real man/woman/something u will never understand (was he ever?), Prince dropped his name/title and took an ancient alchemical symbol (that meant something to someone) as his name. This was when he became the FULL METAL ALCHEMIST. Years later, a Japanese company would make an animated series about him and a boy that he rescued from Michael Jackson. They made many mistakes, but got the essentials right.
After travelling the world fighting evil for several years, Prince came into contact with a scientist who could restore his body. All Prince had to do was use the p-control to rave unto the joy fantastic. With his body restored, Prince took his name back from Harry, so that he was Prince again.
He continues his mission to purplize the universe to this very day.
Prince also invented abbreviated english used in chat rooms and text messages. He did this during the 1920s in anticipation of the rise of Care Bears, which would come some 60 years later. The Care Bears, Tender Heart in particular, made girls think that they didn't have to put out in order to be popular. While his pre-emptive strike was mostly successful there are still to this day teenage girls who do not have premarital sex with boys and other girls at parties while intoxicated. Prince's abbreviated English would be used, not as a code to traffic secret plans but as a phonic weapon. This phonic weapon would trick unsuspecting Care Bears into having sexual relations with Muppets. The outcome of this being the creation of Ewoks. Ewoks remind women of their own pubic region and leave them wanting to do something with it. Ewoks also remind men of a woman's unshaved vagina, but has no effect on them as they already want to do something with it.
With wild sex following the Star Wars movies which came before Care Bears, Prince's Purple Sextopia was safe.
To challenge Prince's master plan, the 7 shaved the Ewoks, inventing two thing in the process:
1) The Hobbit (a.k.a. the Mexican hairless midget).
2) The Brazilian full body wax.
This however didn't stop Prince's plan because 98% of women who get a Brazilian want to show people. 98% of men want to see. Even the gay ones? Especially the gay ones. So everybody is thinking about, looking at or doing something with a vagina. Prince wins.
[edit]
On his way to Earth, Prince's little red space corvette spun out of control and crash landed in the North Pole, where Santa took him in and took care of him. For the next 8,000 years, Prince thought he was one of Santa's elves. Prince thought he was strange because all the other elves wanted to do five year old things like eat cake and play with ribbons, and Prince wanted to 'do' everything that moved. After Prince seduced Mrs Santa, two elves, and a reindeer, Santa decided to tell Prince the truth. After discovering that he was an alien, Prince started a music career on Earth so he could have sex with women who wanted to be famous.
During this time he remembered his mission to destroy Michael Jackson. He went to the Neverland Ranch where Michael Jackson thought he was a child. Prince spent the next four weeks in hospital. In order to save his life the doctors turned Prince into a crime fighting cyborg. It was during this time that Prince played the lead role in Robocop 2.
Thinking that he was no longer a real man/woman/something u will never understand (was he ever?), Prince dropped his name/title and took an ancient alchemical symbol (that meant something to someone) as his name. This was when he became the FULL METAL ALCHEMIST. Years later, a Japanese company would make an animated series about him and a boy that he rescued from Michael Jackson. They made many mistakes, but got the essentials right.
After travelling the world fighting evil for several years, Prince came into contact with a scientist who could restore his body. All Prince had to do was use the p-control to rave unto the joy fantastic. With his body restored, Prince took his name back from Harry, so that he was Prince again.
He continues his mission to purplize the universe to this very day.
Prince also invented abbreviated english used in chat rooms and text messages. He did this during the 1920s in anticipation of the rise of Care Bears, which would come some 60 years later. The Care Bears, Tender Heart in particular, made girls think that they didn't have to put out in order to be popular. While his pre-emptive strike was mostly successful there are still to this day teenage girls who do not have premarital sex with boys and other girls at parties while intoxicated. Prince's abbreviated English would be used, not as a code to traffic secret plans but as a phonic weapon. This phonic weapon would trick unsuspecting Care Bears into having sexual relations with Muppets. The outcome of this being the creation of Ewoks. Ewoks remind women of their own pubic region and leave them wanting to do something with it. Ewoks also remind men of a woman's unshaved vagina, but has no effect on them as they already want to do something with it.
With wild sex following the Star Wars movies which came before Care Bears, Prince's Purple Sextopia was safe.
To challenge Prince's master plan, the 7 shaved the Ewoks, inventing two thing in the process:
1) The Hobbit (a.k.a. the Mexican hairless midget).
2) The Brazilian full body wax.
This however didn't stop Prince's plan because 98% of women who get a Brazilian want to show people. 98% of men want to see. Even the gay ones? Especially the gay ones. So everybody is thinking about, looking at or doing something with a vagina. Prince wins.
[edit]