03-11-2002, 07:21 PM
I just got in a discussion of the whole "special" thing with some chick who lives in the city. I said that it was appauling that they were commemorating the 6 month anniversary. She said it was because from CT and not a New Yorker. (That seems to be the reply I alway get from New Yorkers.) I have a different attitude. 6 months is not an anniversary. It is a made up passage of time that a girlfriend wants to celebrate, a point in time where she either sleeps with you for the first time, expects a ring if you have been sleeping together,.... IT IS NOT AN ANNIVERSARY. I was also dismayed that all the news stations were basically showing reruns; I was so sick this morning that I had to fight my wife's wishes of knowing the temperature that I put on Sportscenter because ESPN was the only station that was not showing the footage.
Then it hit me. Although they fail by comparison in level of importance, but I hate to see Scott Norwood's kick miss and Brett Hull Score his OT goal. I am physically sickened by the footage and I don't need to relive the emotional anguish. Even if I did not feel anything immediately, I have had plenty of time to comprehend what has happend and I do not want to relive it with the guise of innocence lost. I simply don't want to go through it again. I don't want to have children because my grandchildren will ask me about it. I want to move on, I do not want to relive the horror.
As for how it changed me, I am full of hate. I now hate people who are different from me. I no longer trust the black teenager in Hillfanger jeans and I will not try to bury that mistrust by saying "now don't be a racists, whitey". I now notice that my Chinesse coworkers do smell bad. I now say "fuck the considerations for your diet that you religion puts apon you! I could have had my fucking food 5 minutes ago." And, finally, I no longer respect Muslims for their piety and religious disipline.
I don't know, either I have changed, or against all devices otherwise I have devolved into a New Yorker (or I became an Italian immigrant).
Then it hit me. Although they fail by comparison in level of importance, but I hate to see Scott Norwood's kick miss and Brett Hull Score his OT goal. I am physically sickened by the footage and I don't need to relive the emotional anguish. Even if I did not feel anything immediately, I have had plenty of time to comprehend what has happend and I do not want to relive it with the guise of innocence lost. I simply don't want to go through it again. I don't want to have children because my grandchildren will ask me about it. I want to move on, I do not want to relive the horror.
As for how it changed me, I am full of hate. I now hate people who are different from me. I no longer trust the black teenager in Hillfanger jeans and I will not try to bury that mistrust by saying "now don't be a racists, whitey". I now notice that my Chinesse coworkers do smell bad. I now say "fuck the considerations for your diet that you religion puts apon you! I could have had my fucking food 5 minutes ago." And, finally, I no longer respect Muslims for their piety and religious disipline.
I don't know, either I have changed, or against all devices otherwise I have devolved into a New Yorker (or I became an Italian immigrant).