Handless masturbation

[AdolescentMasturbator]

stickysituation2: have you ever masturbaed without using your hands?
stickysituation2: ive found the perfect technique thats way better than using your hand
The Clear Stuff: what?
*** Auto-response sent to The Clear Stuff: I am currently away from the computer.
The Clear Stuff: how is it possible?
stickysituation2: get a towel
stickysituation2: wrap it around
stickysituation2: simulate as a vagina
stickysituation2: and bang away
stickysituation2: and you dont have to worry about getting a tissue
stickysituation2: its a win-win situation all around
The Clear Stuff: does it feel like a real vagina?
stickysituation2: nah
stickysituation2: but its way better than normal masturbation
stickysituation2: because it stimulates the head of the penis way more
The Clear Stuff: what do you do with the towel?
stickysituation2: wash the Hell out of it
stickysituation2: i wash it in the laundry seperate from everything else
stickysituation2: and only use it for that specific purpose
The Clear Stuff: sounds risky
stickysituation2: i guess you can use several layers of toilet paper
stickysituation2: but i dont think itll feel as good
The Clear Stuff: you should post this convo on cdih
stickysituation2: done

Anyone have any better ideas?

[HollywoodJewMoses]

christ man, i cant believe you actually posted this

[criticslovesnatch]

aren't you like 12?

[Danked]

You guys have some pretty fucked up AIM conversations.

[Hybrid]

:rofl:

[AdolescentMasturbator]

CLS, when are you playing the Laugh Factory with your astonishingly original material?

How is it fucked up? Don't tell me you've never tried to jerk it without your hands.

[The Sleeper]

Anyone have any better ideas?

use sandpaper

[AdolescentMasturbator]

That's a good idea. Then I can use the blood as lubricant for next time.

[Hybrid]

am. you're one fucked up individual. post more stories please. :lol:

[The Sleeper]

youve been listening to too much black metal

[AdolescentMasturbator]

I think I'm going to go out on top and take my nap.

If I was listening to too much black metal I'd be whining about the Christians defiling the aryan race in a high-pitched voice and how the Jews are trying to destroy music instead of inventive masturbation techniques.



Edited By AdolescentMasturbator on 1036563828

[The Sleeper]

wait, if you use the towel for masturbating, what do you wear on your head???

[AdolescentMasturbator]

That's what the C4 is for duh.

[LyricalGomez]

I said it in chat, I'll say it here

Spend more time finding real pussy

[AdolescentMasturbator]

Does real pussy give you weird rashes on the tip of your penis? I thought not.

[criticslovesnatch]

pussy > towels.

[AdolescentMasturbator]

At least towels don't spit.

[LyricalGomez]

Please tell me that was a joke

You are honestly trying to convince us that your fucking towel is better than pussy?

Go kill yourself right now and end it all

[AdolescentMasturbator]

You are just jealous because you only have crappy kleenex tissues.

[LyricalGomez]

I stick with the real thing thank you very much