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The battle between blackie and whitey.
#1
I was driving around yesterday and I get stuck behind an ambulance. They couldn't double park, they had to park flat in the middle so no one could get by. I wanted to back out but there were a bunch of cars behind me that wouldnt budge.

So I put it in park and wait, I look off to my left and notice a cat sitting around and eating out of a can of cat food. We have a bunch of wackos here who leave cat food to feed the homeless cats.

This cat is white with some grey stripes and he's eating away then all of a sudden a black cat pops outta nowhere. This black cat is staring at the white cat eating and is sniffing around. So he smacks the white cat upside the head with its paw and pushes the can away and starts eating from it. This little nigger cat jacked up the white cat. The white cat tries to sneak in from the side and figured they would share but the black cat started swinging at it again.

All of a sudden the black cat starts moving the can behind a gate and I noticed why in a second. A Cocker spaniel being walked all of sudden starts barking at it but blackie is beind the gate just eating, he dont care but whitey runs away. The owner of the spaniel pulls him off and they leave.

So now blackie has no one to bother him and he's chompin away at the can of cat food. About 30 seconds goes by and whitey comes back, blackie notices him and kinda stares him down and whitey just looks away and patiently sits there. He sits there for about 10 seconds and is waiting. Then his opening comes as blackie gets greedy and overconfident and sticks his whole face into the can probably diggin at the bottom. Whitey grabs opportunity and jumps on blackie and scratches him across the back and the rumble ensues whitey sucker punched him and blackie never stood a chance.

A beat up blackie finally gives up and whitey reclaims his can but alas all was in vain... the can was empty...

Poor whitey.
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#2
I'm tearing up.
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#3
what kinda cat food was it?
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#4
It was a yellow label on the can, I never bought cat food so I dunno and I didnt have my glasses so I couldnt read it.
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#5
details!! details!!!

I'll bet it was Whiskas, cats love that shit - if I were a cat, I'd fight for it!
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#6
It's unimportant, who cares what brand it was, whatever brand has a yellow label. If you saw two bums fighting of a ham sandwich who cares if its boarshead or black forrest, they are homeless what do they care.
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#7
I'd fight over a boar's head cold cut sammich, they make some tasty lunchmeats.
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#8
i agree! if it was boars head that would change the whole story.
what kind of bread was in the sadwich?
I love him. He's like those happy old people who become known for sitting by the side of a busy street and waving to passing cars. People drive by regularly and beep just to see him and get him to wave to them.

That's just like our Arpi... except he doesn't wave or anything. He just says mean things to you.


GonzoStyle Wrote:I pledge my undying love for Arpi, any retraction of this undying love is to be ignored.



Nominated for," 2005 poster of the year", by 4 out of 6 mods!
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#9
I hope it was seedless rye - the perfect compliment to Boars' Head ham.
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#10
Don't forget the swiss and the mayo.
I hold the dubious honor of being the only person never modded who has also never been to a party who in the past had a shared account with a vegetable reference that has had consensual sex with a woman who wasn't from the board that also knows what >) means and remembers the end of the golden age.
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#11
swiss and brown mustard... you don't put mayo on ham!!!
[Image: post-13-72783-laz_vs_the_world.jpg]
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#12
Maybe there was poison in it. That'd be okay.
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#13
yeah, seriously - mayo has no business being on ham!!

can't forget the dill pickle, either.
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#14
Mayo is just plain disgusting.
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The spooks come out at night.
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#15
MAYO?!?! repulsive!
sometimes honey mustard, and a little brie.
I love him. He's like those happy old people who become known for sitting by the side of a busy street and waving to passing cars. People drive by regularly and beep just to see him and get him to wave to them.

That's just like our Arpi... except he doesn't wave or anything. He just says mean things to you.


GonzoStyle Wrote:I pledge my undying love for Arpi, any retraction of this undying love is to be ignored.



Nominated for," 2005 poster of the year", by 4 out of 6 mods!
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#16
yellow mustard is ok when deli mustard isn't an option, but it's an awful substitute.
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#17
beats mayo
I love him. He's like those happy old people who become known for sitting by the side of a busy street and waving to passing cars. People drive by regularly and beep just to see him and get him to wave to them.

That's just like our Arpi... except he doesn't wave or anything. He just says mean things to you.


GonzoStyle Wrote:I pledge my undying love for Arpi, any retraction of this undying love is to be ignored.



Nominated for," 2005 poster of the year", by 4 out of 6 mods!
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#18
agreed.
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#19
I guess I'm out voted here...
I hold the dubious honor of being the only person never modded who has also never been to a party who in the past had a shared account with a vegetable reference that has had consensual sex with a woman who wasn't from the board that also knows what >) means and remembers the end of the golden age.
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#20
mayo works with tuna.
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