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+--- Thread: Monster Java Chug (/showthread.php?tid=2418)
Monster Java Chug - cuddlebunzz - 02-06-2009
so after hearing zanes time of 15.8 seconds for a 15 oz. can, i figured i coule do a hell of alot better. then i watched the video of the next days show and was a little more impressed. but i still thought i could do better than 10.8. so i went to the gas station on my way to work and bought 2 of the moster javas. i went into my boss' office and asked him how fast he tought i could chug one. he said "14.8 seconds, you cant beat Zane." i was surprised because he doesnt listen to the show very often. i was also disappointed that he didnt give me a better time. he pulled up an online stopwatch and i went for it. first of all i hate coffee but i tryed to be as authentic to them as possible. second of all im sick and cant breathe. about a third of the way through the can a little spills down my chin. no biggie. then almost to the end i cough. the monster explodes everywhere. i tried to keep it over a trash can, which didnt work too well. it spilld all over my shirt, its coming out my nose and my eyes are watering so i cant see. my boss' cracking up sure doesnt help me either. i only had a little left to go to finish but my boss stopped the time at 11.8 seconds. im confident that if i was not sick and had i drink i could tolerate i could have beat Zanes time. oh yea and now my chest hurts like and emmer effer. this must be how Zane felt when joe powdered his ribs. i was just wondering if anyone else has tried to beat them yet. i know there are people that can just throw one down no problem.
Monster Java Chug - Biff - 02-06-2009
http://www.unc.edu/depts/wcweb/handouts/paragraphs.html
Monster Java Chug - cuddlebunzz - 02-06-2009
thanks much. i wasnt really trying to be a perfect writing/english student. nut ill try in the future.
Monster Java Chug - Rock Monster - 02-06-2009
cuddlebunzz Wrote:oh yea and now my chest hurts like and emmer effer. this must be how Zane felt when joe powdered his ribs.
Take the pain you're feeling, add a steak knife piercing your side, and continue it for about 2 months. That's what a cracked rib feels like.
Monster Java Chug - Philly Mike - 02-06-2009
i am sure i could kick ass in a chug, i will have to video myself on it and up it to youtube then send it in.
Monster Java Chug - cuddlebunzz - 02-06-2009
i know theres people who can open their throat and it just pours down. i can chug a beer in pretty good time, not exsactly sure how fast but fast enough. the java monster is disgusting though. i hate coffee. also, just speculating on what cracked ribs feels like. never been there.
Monster Java Chug - plungerhand - 02-06-2009
Rock Monster Wrote:cuddlebunzz Wrote:oh yea and now my chest hurts like and emmer effer. this must be how Zane felt when joe powdered his ribs.
Take the pain you're feeling, add a steak knife piercing your side, and continue it for about 2 months. That's what a cracked rib feels like.
This old man rolled his 4 wheeler 2 yrs ago and cracked 2 ribs.... Now envision a 2 year old not understanding Daddy's pain and jumping on him anyway.
Monster Java Chug - plungerhand - 02-06-2009
cuddlebunzz Wrote:thanks much. i wasnt really trying to be a perfect writing/english student. nut ill try in the future.
No one points out grammar/punctuation errors to be a dick. But, if you actually want someone to read your drivel....
Monster Java Chug - Rock Monster - 02-06-2009
jus' P Wrote:Rock Monster Wrote:Take the pain you're feeling, add a steak knife piercing your side, and continue it for about 2 months. That's what a cracked rib feels like.
This old man rolled his 4 wheeler 2 yrs ago and cracked 2 ribs.... Now envision a 2 year old not understanding Daddy's pain and jumping on him anyway.
It would take all of my energy to not punch that kid in the face.
Monster Java Chug - Biff - 02-06-2009
I broke a rib and not sneezing for 6 weeks is a challenge.
Monster Java Chug - plungerhand - 02-06-2009
Rock Monster Wrote:jus' P Wrote:This old man rolled his 4 wheeler 2 yrs ago and cracked 2 ribs.... Now envision a 2 year old not understanding Daddy's pain and jumping on him anyway.
It would take all of my energy to not punch that kid in the face.
you're a better man than I.... I knocked him out :'(
Monster Java Chug - Queenie - 02-06-2009
jus' P Wrote:Rock Monster Wrote:It would take all of my energy to not punch that kid in the face.
you're a better man than I.... I knocked him out :'(
You'd better thank your lucky stars I wasn't around at the time, or I would've . . . to the moon! :-[
don'tEffwithmykids
Monster Java Chug - cuddlebunzz - 02-06-2009
jus' P Wrote:Rock Monster Wrote:It would take all of my energy to not punch that kid in the face.
you're a better man than I.... I knocked him out :'(
thats harsh!
Monster Java Chug - sunshyne - 02-06-2009
Admin Wrote:I broke a rib and not sneezing for 6 weeks is a challenge.
I had my nose broken, the doctors put it back straight, but told me not to sneeze or yawn big. I sneezed and now i have a "deviated septum"
Monster Java Chug - Rock Monster - 02-06-2009
sunshyne Wrote:Admin Wrote:I broke a rib and not sneezing for 6 weeks is a challenge.
I had my nose broken, the doctors put it back straight, but told me not to sneeze or yawn big. I sneezed and now i have a "deviated septum"
I always had a feeling that you were a deviant...
Monster Java Chug - potthole - 02-06-2009
jus' P Wrote:cuddlebunzz Wrote:thanks much. i wasnt really trying to be a perfect writing/english student. nut ill try in the future.
No one points out grammar/punctuation errors to be a dick. But, if you actually want someone to read your drivel....
Ready Plunger, 'cuz here comes my favorite phrase... BINGO!
cuddle, I didn't even bother reading your massive block of text. Break it up into paragraph form, and it'll be more inviting to the eyes. When most people open up a thread and see a big black blob of text, their eyes glaze over, and they move right along.
Now, if you enjoy having people ignore your posts, then by all means, continue right along...
Monster Java Chug - cuddlebunzz - 02-06-2009
as i was typing i didnt think it was going to be that long. i even thought about it before i posted. i didnt think it was going to be this big aof a deal but i guess i was wrong.
Monster Java Chug - dumberthanzane - 02-08-2009
You really know what he likes to do instead of chugging....his mouth opens real wide to take it all in
Monster Java Chug - burnking - 02-09-2009
cuddleslut, two issues. One, could you, for the love of God and all that is holy, capitalize something? Anything. Please. If you have to pick one thing, make it the mother f'ing "i" that's ALWAYS capitalized! Cripes man, it makes you seem like a degenerate. Second issue, why would you ever think that cuddlebunzz is an appropriate name for a male? That's worse than Moon Unit Zappa, and that's saying a lot.
Monster Java Chug - beckyp - 02-09-2009
burnking Wrote:cuddleslut, two issues. One, could you, for the love of God and all that is holy, capitalize something? Anything. Please. If you have to pick one thing, make it the mother f'ing "i" that's ALWAYS capitalized! Cripes man, it makes you seem like a degenerate.
Monster Java Chug - -Jiggy- - 02-09-2009
burnking Wrote:cuddleslut, two issues. One, could you, for the love of God and all that is holy, capitalize something? Anything. Please. If you have to pick one thing, make it the mother f'ing "i" that's ALWAYS capitalized! Cripes man, it makes you seem like a degenerate. Second issue, why would you ever think that cuddlebunzz is an appropriate name for a male? That's worse than Moon Unit Zappa, and that's saying a lot.This doesn't annoy me nearly as much as all caps, but yeah, I know what you mean!
Monster Java Chug - Rock Monster - 02-09-2009
burnking Wrote:Second issue, why would you ever think that cuddlebunzz is an appropriate name for a male? That's worse than Moon Unit Zappa, and that's saying a lot.
Maybe he's gay?
Monster Java Chug - sunshyne - 02-09-2009
wow, I clicked on this thread thinking it was going to be more about the monster java chug, but it looks like the last few days have been about silly stuff.
Cuddlebutt, just go in and edit your post, add some indents, capitalize a few things and post some pictures of you with a hot chick thats not your sister so everyone can go back to talking about the hilariousness that I like to call- Free Beer "Oh god, its coming out my nose!" (or something to that effect)
Monster Java Chug - Howie Feltersnatch - 02-09-2009
a buddy of mine can take a 16oz beer mug (full of beer) and down it...imagine slowly pouring a beer from a mug into a sink, thats how he drinks it slowly tipping his head and mug back, no swallowing just pouring it down his throat.
the only person that can drink faster than him (his words) is his mother.
granted a can is differnt than a mug, but loves monster so i'll have to send him the video link
Monster Java Chug - sunshyne - 02-09-2009
get him to try it and take a picture when it comes out his nose!
Monster Java Chug - burnking - 02-10-2009
Jo Wrote:burnking Wrote:cuddleslut, two issues. One, could you, for the love of God and all that is holy, capitalize something? Anything. Please. If you have to pick one thing, make it the mother f'ing "i" that's ALWAYS capitalized! Cripes man, it makes you seem like a degenerate.
None of that, you at least capitalize some words every once in awhile.
Also, nothing against you specifically cuddleslut, I just finally have free time to post so I felt I needed to come back with a vengence.
Monster Java Chug - cuddlebunzz - 02-10-2009
Thats cool. I have no problem with what anyone says. Also, I'm not gay. Just so you know.