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| Posted By | Discussion Topic: FU to unexpected farts. | ||||
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| Numb Nutts | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 11:03 AM |    | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Aug. 01  | I take pride in my own farts. All I ask for is a little warning. Im sitting at my desk trying to get some work done. Then, out of nowhere, a silent "puffer" leaks out of my ass. To top it all off it really stunk. It was one of those one where I would have pulled the covers over my head and enjoyed it. I sit in an open cubicle, everyone around me suddenly had an urge to go take a walk or go have a cigarette. The best part is I got up and left as well. This one guy sat at his desk and continued working. I am hoping everyone thinks he was the culprit.  This message was edited by Numb Nutts on 10-31-01 @ 11:10 AM | ||||
| hornygoatweed I've Got A Vagina With Teeth. G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S. Dragoon Battalion My friends call me Weed | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 11:16 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | I'll second this FU mainly because it hapenned to me twice yesterday. I don't know what was going on in my colon yesterday, but I let out two silent-but-deadlies at my cubicle - same as you, open to the general public. Luckily for me, it was a low-traffic time of the day (just before lunch), so noone caught a hint of it, and I would have been nailed as the culprit because the two people who normally sit in my vacinity were out of the office. I'm happy to report that my colon is in good working order today :)  You can reach me through AIM or email. Don't be shy, drop a line and say Hi! | ||||
| IrishAlkey Chucky Official OA.com Homo CUNT ROCKETTE Look who's laughing now, fuckers!!! Is It In Yet? JYD-4-LIFE [Sarcasm]Subzero316 fan since day one!!1!![/Sarcasm] "my mod powers are on temporary hiatus" This status is sponsored by: P®oJë©T M@¥hέm | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 1:57 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Aug. 01 | quote: Now I can die in peace.  | ||||
| Tequila Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal! Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!! | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 2:36 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Jan. 01 | quote: I am all in favor of you killing yourself but if you choose to do so at least use a gun its much faster  AOL/AIM - oanda1027fm | ||||
| The Sleeper Being a Minor is a Threat to my Social Life PoseUr i ahve 2 threads at teh top, i feel like maynard | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 2:57 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00 | Isn't it ironic that the loudest farts rarely smell but the quitest farts are fuckin nasty?  This message was edited by The Sleeper on 10-31-01 @ 3:01 PM | ||||
| Numb Nutts | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 3:16 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Aug. 01 | I never think my own farts are nasty. Remember someone made the thread about mixing shit smells? Well I feel the same way about myu farts, no matter how strong thed smell, I love to take a wiff of my own gas. | ||||
| Drunken GW I Pissed on a Church to get this Status. | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 3:17 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Dec. 00 | quote: Sorry but I have to disagree. It's simple: farts = funny unexpected farts = more funny  If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either. | ||||
| Arpikarhu Harmless Teddy I wish Maynard was still posting here so I could implant my head up his ass. Needle dick, bear salesman. I think I'm a revolutionary. Actually, I'm a one trick pony. I enjoy C&BT | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 3:22 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Apr. 01 | quote: maybe if you didnt take so much cock in your ass you might have more sphincter control Arpi Karhu Kauppias Forever!!! AIM- Arpikarhu  | ||||
| hornygoatweed I've Got A Vagina With Teeth. G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S. Dragoon Battalion My friends call me Weed | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 3:24 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | quote: Unless they're comprised of a night of White Castle belly-bombs and drinking - those farts are the smell of death. quote: I have a friend that can take your theory of loudness=lack-of-odor and throw it out the window. This guy rips them cannon-style, and always lights up the room he's in - [Nortonvoice}AWFUL![/Nortonvoice] You can reach me through AIM or email. Don't be shy, drop a line and say Hi! | ||||
| Numb Nutts | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 3:34 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Aug. 01 | This is slightly off topic.... But OI went into the mens room to let out another stink bomb from my ass. Well there was a guy sitting in the stall taking adump, so I shut the lights off just as this LOUD fart was released. That shutting the lights off never gets old. | ||||
| F the S out of her A | posted on 10-31-2001 @ 7:46 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Jun. 01 | I think it is a cumulative effect, but I am laughing like a special ed kid who just got a hummer from his teacher. Farts, loud or silent = funny My story: I moved out from home and was on a steady diet of beer and fried take-out for a while. Some days, I would have a fart circus at my desk. Originally, I took the Clinton military policy of "don't ask, don't tell," but after a while, the supervisor, the office comic, "outed" me as the one dropping the SBD's in the office. His evidence was my chair, which stunk to hell. Sure, I zapped it with Lysol that night after everyone left, but, oof!, that hurt. I did't learn the lesson of diet, but I did manage to turn the lights off in the bathroom without using the switch after that! [/too much information] Corn- the tracer-bullets of the digestive system | ||||
| GonzoStyle | posted on 11-01-2001 @ 10:05 AM | | |||
| Hanger-On Registered: Jan. 70 | quote: Thank you for making me laugh and you just earned yourself a new status.  If I could capture the rage of today's youth and bottle it Crush the glass with my bare hands and swallow it And spit it back in the face of you racists And hypocrites who think the same shit but don't say shit You Liberaces, Versaces and Nazi's watch me You motherfuckers wanna judge me cuz you're not me She-Mail Me Here | ||||
| King f-tard | posted on 11-01-2001 @ 12:58 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Feb. 01 | wow, so much to tell, so little time. I actually have a few casette tapes of when I was younger, like between the ages of 12-16 full of different rips. Some are impressive beefs, some are just regular, and there are some that are spectacular. I made an "all-star tape" which I gave to friends for christmas, 50 of the greatest farts of all time recorded. In high school we had a class called sports in america, which was just a jock class where we talked about sports the whole time. The teacher was pretty cool and we started the MBC. Multer (teachers last name) Beefing Championship. We kept track every day of who did how many and how annoyed the teacher got. My personal favorite, well its not great to do, but still, when you fart when getting a blowjob. Especially if it smells. Thats just bad. I have done that quite a few times. Now at work, I have now gotten into just going into crowds and letting them go, hopefully silent as can be, and then walking thru and watching people look around and see who the hell did that. It's hysterical. My officemate at work needs a gas mask, it gets so bad sometimes.  IM me Or E-Mail Me This message was edited by King f-tard on 11-1-01 @ 1:12 PM | ||||
| hornygoatweed I've Got A Vagina With Teeth. G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S. Dragoon Battalion My friends call me Weed | posted on 11-01-2001 @ 1:08 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | quote: Elevators are classic for this - but only for the silent ones. The best are the people who smell it, and you know they smell it, but they try to act as if there is no scent of rotten sausage & peppers in the air. Makes for a great laugh! You can reach me through AIM or email. Don't be shy, drop a line and say Hi! | ||||
| The Mrs. | posted on 11-01-2001 @ 1:11 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Feb. 01 | What are these farts you speak of?? Filzy comment???? :) Filzy's significant other and graduate. | ||||
The sky is blue | posted on 11-01-2001 @ 3:41 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Oct. 00 | quote: ...and new spanking material.  Fez® blah blah blah ©2001 blah blah blah. Fez™ blah blah Email me at fezoanda@hotmail.com | ||||
| The Painter 1/2 a bottle of Jack Daniels... it's a cure-all | posted on 11-02-2001 @ 6:30 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Sep. 00 | quote:That's right, Women don't fart;) But when they do, they always look so surprised.  | ||||
| Numb Nutts | posted on 11-02-2001 @ 8:40 AM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Aug. 01 | I think I found the root to my problem. Every morning I have been eating a bagel with Veggie Cream Cheese. It think it has some kind of effect on my digestive system. That would expain why my underpants smell like a spring garden that is heavily fertilized with horse shit. | ||||
| barch97 BBTB The barch gots lots a dick I kind of enjoy my anonymity on the board WOW Forum Ambassador | posted on 11-02-2001 @ 9:36 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Jul. 00 | quote:an interesting parallel... I've been noticing that the worse my kid's diaper smells the less actual content there is. go figure...  Long Live the "Syndication Underground" | ||||
| GrkqtOandAfan Claim staked by FTL. | posted on 11-02-2001 @ 9:46 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00 | quote: OMG that just brought back a horrible childhood memory, when I was like 2 and I would sleepover my grandparents house, my uncle who was 14 at the time would torture me, one of the things he would do was fart under the covers while I was under them and then not let me out so I wouldnt be able to breathe...lol revenge was always sweet  I know it's wrong and it makes you nauseous. But I'm not suspicious, I'm cautious. And you know I want to love and trust you. But it's really a lot to try and adjust to. | ||||
| GonzoStyle | posted on 11-02-2001 @ 9:49 AM | | |||
| Hanger-On Registered: Jan. 70 | quote: Yeah and is that all your 14 year old "uncle" would do? cause when the sheets were bloody in the morning that was not from farting. If I could capture the rage of today's youth and bottle it Crush the glass with my bare hands and swallow it And spit it back in the face of you racists And hypocrites who think the same shit but don't say shit You Liberaces, Versaces and Nazi's watch me You motherfuckers wanna judge me cuz you're not me She-Mail Me Here | ||||
| GrkqtOandAfan Claim staked by FTL. | posted on 11-02-2001 @ 9:53 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00 | quote: Ok...just because these things happen in YOUR family doesn't mean its standard procedure in all. I know it's wrong and it makes you nauseous. But I'm not suspicious, I'm cautious. And you know I want to love and trust you. But it's really a lot to try and adjust to. This message was edited by GrkqtOandAfan on 11-2-01 @ 9:55 AM | ||||
| King f-tard | posted on 11-02-2001 @ 12:47 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Feb. 01 | Grk, as long as he didnt make you lick off the residual juices that were present on the anus I believe you were fine. What was your revenge? did you sit on his head and rip a few? :) IM me Or E-Mail Me | ||||
Displaying 1-23 of 23 messages in this thread. |