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The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - What is the best way to get rid of a telemarketer


Displaying 1-24 of 24 messages in this thread.
Posted ByDiscussion Topic: What is the best way to get rid of a telemarketer
GEO
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 8:12 PM      
Hanger-On
Registered: Feb. 01
Here is my Top 3.....waddya got...

1. Take the cordless phone into the bathroom and ask them if they can hold a second. Make a big fart noise, grunt, then flush the toilet

2. ..........sound really interested in service/merchandise..........then ask what color panties she's wearing...then groan..........pause... ask again........works every time ! (gets you on/off their list)

3. When you talk to them talk really, really softly. Keep this up for a few minutes until your sure they have their headset turned up all the way and then shout "NO!".

TheJays
This status sponsored by: P®oJë©T M@¥h?m:
I MAKE COOL PICTURES
Proud To Be An American
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 8:25 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jan. 01
After working as a telemarketer, the best way is to ask where they are caling from. Most likely, its from the midwest or South.

Fo shizza my nizza, is it ok to say nizza?




"I haven't felt that good since Artie Gammell score against Holland in 1978." "When a person is insane, as you clearly are, do you know that you're insane? Maybe you're just sitting around, reading "Guns and Ammo", masturbating in your own feces, do you just stop and go, "Wow! It is amazing how fucking crazy I really am!" "Bitch, what you don't know about me I can just about squeeze in the Grand fucking Canyon. Did you know I always wanted to be a dancer in Vegas?" "Bazooko's Circus is what the world would be doing every Saturday night if the Nazis had won the war.
WNEWs GIRL
i don't have a mule but i have a cock
Intercontinental Intergender Thumb Wrestling Champion
CUNT ROCKETTE
The new "third". AmyMohrBuddy

One line in my sig is absolutely fucking disgusting, see if you can find it.
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 8:25 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Aug. 00
un hook your phone


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE MEMORY OF GONZO STYLE WILL BE IN OUR HEARTS FOREVER
I Have A Special Place In My Cunt For Av8er


I LOVE THE SLASH & THE CRACK HITLER & THE REE
FROSTY IS MY HERO, AUSTIN'S MY BABY'S DADDY, I'M MRS. HYBRIDMy Bitches: THE HEAD BITCH Tequila & the HNIC The Brain followed by AntsInMyPants, Av8er In His Own Room , IrishAlkey, Slackjaw, BROTHER JOE, Skitchr4u aka Skitch, HyBriD in the Monkey Cage, darthziggy, Critics Loves Snatch, fbdlingfrg is Stalking in the Bushes, Austin, Hummercash, JJ, DANKED, Drunken GW, SLASH, Flock of Moosen, FollowThisLogic, FNMoron, JoeyBigArms, Faceman, Brokenjaw, LANTERN MAN FROM BAR 9, pantee man, Cancer Mike(Michelle), Mangino, HardCoreDave (TvvisTofFaTe), QuickStop, scmods, mikehern, I swear it was this big aka Tussle King

CriticsLoveSnatch
i know better than to ask for a status from you mean ol' mods
Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag
I shall call him mini-FTL
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 8:27 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
I usually very politely ask them to hold on a second and then hang up.


I am no Superman, not at all
I have no answers
I am no hero, thats for sure
But I do know one thing
Where you are is where I belong
Where you go is where I want to be.
GEO
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 8:27 PM      
Hanger-On
Registered: Feb. 01
The easy way is to unhook the phone....but, what is the best way to horrify them??????

WNEWs GIRL
i don't have a mule but i have a cock
Intercontinental Intergender Thumb Wrestling Champion
CUNT ROCKETTE
The new "third". AmyMohrBuddy

One line in my sig is absolutely fucking disgusting, see if you can find it.
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 8:31 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Aug. 00
i just hang up on them


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE MEMORY OF GONZO STYLE WILL BE IN OUR HEARTS FOREVER
I Have A Special Place In My Cunt For Av8er


I LOVE THE SLASH & THE CRACK HITLER & THE REE
FROSTY IS MY HERO, AUSTIN'S MY BABY'S DADDY, I'M MRS. HYBRIDMy Bitches: THE HEAD BITCH Tequila & the HNIC The Brain followed by AntsInMyPants, Av8er In His Own Room , IrishAlkey, Slackjaw, BROTHER JOE, Skitchr4u aka Skitch, HyBriD in the Monkey Cage, darthziggy, Critics Loves Snatch, fbdlingfrg is Stalking in the Bushes, Austin, Hummercash, JJ, DANKED, Drunken GW, SLASH, Flock of Moosen, FollowThisLogic, FNMoron, JoeyBigArms, Faceman, Brokenjaw, LANTERN MAN FROM BAR 9, pantee man, Cancer Mike(Michelle), Mangino, HardCoreDave (TvvisTofFaTe), QuickStop, scmods, mikehern, I swear it was this big aka Tussle King

Subzero316
TERRORIST
voted most likely to get searched at the airport
Subama Bin Zero
(© AntsInMyPants - 2002)
Seriously need to rethink my concept of "funny"
Alkey is my bitch! I'm havening a hard time fittening in.
It's official, I am seriously a complete and utter ass-tool, please anally rape me with a rusty 5 iron wraped in barbed wire.
I am the new Balloon Not. Be careful around me ladies, I don't use common sense.
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 8:55 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
quote:

what is the best way to horrify them??????


I say act like a son of a bitch and ask them to get you some beer. if they get the hint they will hang up.


"Scorpion stinks and I don't like him"
Ree
Unofficial Biggest Whore of OA.com
G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
Reaver Strike Battalion
Rage Brother #1, Paladin of Hatred
Where's my snare? I have no snare in my headphones.
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 9:01 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Jun. 01
I say in my best Patrick Bateman voice 'Do you like Huey Lewis and the News?'





Fuck with me and die. Rehab is for quitters. Overdose? Try harder.

I love the WNEW'S GIRL, Follow This Logic, my brother in Rage, and your fucking mother.HYBRID is GEY

Shame on a nigga who tries to run game on a nigga.
Lent
Black Rock Coalition
Do you have a basketball in your car?
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 9:20 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: May. 00
I say my name. Deez....Deez Nuts.



Email
- AIM:lentnycGO LENTSITE.COM IS WORSE THAN TEH AIDS!!!

silera
Sexiest flower in the garden
Garden my ass! That's a bush!

I Like to suck dick
I suck it all day long
I like to suck dick
Nothing like a great big wong.
I like to suck dick
I'll do it till the day I croak
Just don't ask me to swallow.
Cause I'll probably choke
fag-hag
Subzero316 makes me hot!
JYD-4-LIFE's HBIC now i suck a mod's dick too!
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 9:52 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Feb. 02
1. I tell them I'm not home.
2. If they speak English I tell them I only speak Spanish.
3. If they speak Spanish I tell them I only speak English.
4. If they speak both I tell them to fuck off in both languages.





Now, a question of etiquette, as I pass, do I give you the ass or the crotch?
I'm as real as cancer.
JYD 4LIFE!!!1 Where my dawgz at??


Bloody Anus
P.L.F.
Portugese Liberation Front- Liberating Status' everywhere from the Tyranny of Portugal
HYBRID THINKS I'M A GENIUS
posted on 06-28-2002 @ 10:01 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Jul. 00
Order a pizza. When they act all confused, say "oops I must have the wrong number", and hang up.





I think my mask of sanity              is about to slip


2002 Crack Committee ObJectives:
1. 74 Wins, 4th place in NL East for Mets this Year 2. Break at least one knuckle by October
3. All 5 Starters finish Dead last in run support this year 4. Mets win by 10+ runs once this season

Kramden's Delicious Marshall
I think Yoda is sexy.
posted on 06-29-2002 @ 12:27 AM      
Psychopath
Registered: Sep. 01
Act aloof




"My style is impetuous, my defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat your children."
HyBriD
I AM THE KILLER
FN Moron is an indian giver!!
I had my cool status for about 10 min. then it was gone. GONE!
G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
Agent WD40 Licensed to Kill
My spoon is TOO BIG. (finally)
WORD UP KIDDIES! This is Poop Dog, the gangsta specta of defeat!
Hanger-on to the JYDs for LIFE
I INVENTED ORANGE MOTHERFUCKER
This status is sponsored by:
P®oJë©T M@¥hέm
posted on 06-29-2002 @ 1:08 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Sep. 01
tell them you are going to rape and murder their mother and grandmother in the next 48 hours.




FUCK YOU ALL. DIE.


JYD-4-LIFE! w00f!
BigStupid
I got a new status because Alkey figured out how to do it.
posted on 06-29-2002 @ 1:10 AM      
Psychopath
Registered: May. 02
I heard this one from friend. "If they ask for your spouse(boyfriend, girlfriend, etc.), ask what it is in regards to. If they don't give you a straight answer tell them you're sure that your spouse is cheating on you and you think the caller is doing the fucking. Tell them that your partners's in for a real treat when they get home 'cause you're going to smash their fucking head in."
RottenVinny
I have no fucking clue what happened to Sluggo667.
VinnyWS6: chicks? they dont have the penis so why would i care about them
VinnyWS6: froy is quite hansome
VinnyWS6: I want froys cock!
posted on 06-29-2002 @ 1:20 AM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jun. 01
Just say
"Please, put me on your do not call list"
No more calls from them for 6 months. :)



This message was edited by RottenVinny on 6-29-02 @ 1:26 AM
TheJays
This status sponsored by: P®oJë©T M@¥h?m:
I MAKE COOL PICTURES
Proud To Be An American
posted on 06-29-2002 @ 1:24 AM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jan. 01
"Do not call" is the pussy way of doing it. What ya gotta do is always have the audio of the chainsaw scene from "American Psycho" handy, and when they call, tell them to hold on for a sec, then put the phone to the speaker.

Fo shizza my nizza, is it ok to say nizza?




"I haven't felt that good since Artie Gammell score against Holland in 1978." "When a person is insane, as you clearly are, do you know that you're insane? Maybe you're just sitting around, reading "Guns and Ammo", masturbating in your own feces, do you just stop and go, "Wow! It is amazing how fucking crazy I really am!" "Bitch, what you don't know about me I can just about squeeze in the Grand fucking Canyon. Did you know I always wanted to be a dancer in Vegas?" "Bazooko's Circus is what the world would be doing every Saturday night if the Nazis had won the war.
FoundryMusicJJ
G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
Soldier of Fortune Spec Ops Division
posted on 06-29-2002 @ 6:58 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Feb. 01
1.I tell em to eat shit and hang up
2.I ask em what their # is and what time they are eating dinner so i can interrupt their meal.
3.I tell them that i know where they live and im gonna break in and ass rape em. (this always gets them to hang up)
4.I answer the phone in my best Clinton voice and tell em that they have reached Bubba's palace of love and that if they're a woman intern that they get a free pass.
5.tell em that I'm right outside their house looking into the window.
6.I ask em what would they do for a Klondike Bar

Wealth is too precious to be entrusted to the rich.

BIG THANX TO AUSTIN FOR THE SIGPIC




This message was edited by FoundryMusicJJ on 6-29-02 @ 7:22 PM
Lent
Black Rock Coalition
Do you have a basketball in your car?
posted on 06-29-2002 @ 8:21 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: May. 00
At radio shack today i found this device called the telezapper. It automatically detects telemarketers. (they usually call at random via a computer) and fools them to think you are disconnected.



Email
- AIM:lentnycGO LENTSITE.COM IS WORSE THAN TEH AIDS!!!

WNEWs GIRL
i don't have a mule but i have a cock
Intercontinental Intergender Thumb Wrestling Champion
CUNT ROCKETTE
The new "third". AmyMohrBuddy

One line in my sig is absolutely fucking disgusting, see if you can find it.
posted on 06-29-2002 @ 8:29 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Aug. 00
tell them the person theyre looking for had passed away the night before


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE MEMORY OF GONZO STYLE WILL BE IN OUR HEARTS FOREVER
I Have A Special Place In My Cunt For Av8er


I LOVE THE SLASH & THE CRACK HITLER & THE REE
FROSTY IS MY HERO, AUSTIN'S MY BABY'S DADDY, I'M MRS. HYBRIDMy Bitches: THE HEAD BITCH Tequila & the HNIC The Brain followed by AntsInMyPants, Av8er In His Own Room , IrishAlkey, Slackjaw, BROTHER JOE, Skitchr4u aka Skitch, HyBriD in the Monkey Cage, darthziggy, Critics Loves Snatch, fbdlingfrg is Stalking in the Bushes, Austin, Hummercash, JJ, DANKED, Drunken GW, SLASH, Flock of Moosen, FollowThisLogic, FNMoron, JoeyBigArms, Faceman, Brokenjaw, LANTERN MAN FROM BAR 9, pantee man, Cancer Mike(Michelle), Mangino, HardCoreDave (TvvisTofFaTe), QuickStop, scmods, mikehern, I swear it was this big aka Tussle King

Ants in My Pants
Billy

Well, since this thread is going to be deleted anyway... I'm a flaming homosexual and I love having big hard hot man meat rammed into my mouth and ass. Umm, this IS going to be deleted, right???
Prettiest Butterfly in the garden
All Blow job poems ©Fez 2002-2003. I'm obsessed with Alkey's penis.
posted on 06-30-2002 @ 1:39 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Apr. 01
quote:

tell them the person theyre looking for had passed away the night before
Yer kiddin'. How did it haaappen?



Thank you Austin!
WNEWs GIRL
i don't have a mule but i have a cock
Intercontinental Intergender Thumb Wrestling Champion
CUNT ROCKETTE
The new "third". AmyMohrBuddy

One line in my sig is absolutely fucking disgusting, see if you can find it.
posted on 06-30-2002 @ 1:44 AM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Aug. 00
he caught aids from having too much gay anal sex


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE MEMORY OF GONZO STYLE WILL BE IN OUR HEARTS FOREVER
I Have A Special Place In My Cunt For Av8er


I LOVE THE SLASH & THE CRACK HITLER & THE REE
FROSTY IS MY HERO, AUSTIN'S MY BABY'S DADDY, I'M MRS. HYBRIDMy Bitches: THE HEAD BITCH Tequila & the HNIC The Brain followed by AntsInMyPants, Av8er In His Own Room , IrishAlkey, Slackjaw, BROTHER JOE, Skitchr4u aka Skitch, HyBriD in the Monkey Cage, darthziggy, Critics Loves Snatch, fbdlingfrg is Stalking in the Bushes, Austin, Hummercash, JJ, DANKED, Drunken GW, SLASH, Flock of Moosen, FollowThisLogic, FNMoron, JoeyBigArms, Faceman, Brokenjaw, LANTERN MAN FROM BAR 9, pantee man, Cancer Mike(Michelle), Mangino, HardCoreDave (TvvisTofFaTe), QuickStop, scmods, mikehern, I swear it was this big aka Tussle King



This message was edited by WNEWs GIRL on 6-30-02 @ 1:45 AM
BigStupid
I got a new status because Alkey figured out how to do it.
posted on 06-30-2002 @ 1:45 AM      
Psychopath
Registered: May. 02
Well isn't that somethin', wanna buy some aluminum siding? It blocks the HIV and the AIDS!
Filzy
Stand up straight
Stomach in
Shoulders back
SOUND OFF!!!
posted on 06-30-2002 @ 10:23 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Sep. 00
1. Tell then you're busy sacrificing a goat, and you'll get back to them when you're done.

2. Say you're City morgue and insert witty line i.e. you stab'em we slab 'em!

3. turn on death metal cd and put phone next to speaker (The grosser the merrier!)



"I'm proud that I've never had a drug problem or complained that sucess sucks and shot myself like Kurt Cobain did.
Sorry, but sucess is something people like me dream about.

~Chuck Schuldiner b.05-13-67 d.12-13-01
R.I.P.


[Email]Filzy_metz@hotmail.com[/Email]
HyBriD
I AM THE KILLER
FN Moron is an indian giver!!
I had my cool status for about 10 min. then it was gone. GONE!
G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
Agent WD40 Licensed to Kill
My spoon is TOO BIG. (finally)
WORD UP KIDDIES! This is Poop Dog, the gangsta specta of defeat!
Hanger-on to the JYDs for LIFE
I INVENTED ORANGE MOTHERFUCKER
This status is sponsored by:
P®oJë©T M@¥hέm
posted on 06-30-2002 @ 11:52 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Sep. 01
quote:

2. Say you're City morgue and insert witty line i.e. you stab'em we slab 'em!

haha, i do that! City Morgue you slice em' we dice em'! You kill em' we chill em'!




FUCK YOU ALL. DIE.


JYD-4-LIFE! w00f!



Displaying 1-24 of 24 messages in this thread.