YourMomsBox!

God damned motherfucking menstrual cramps. i fucking hate this. and i'm not even bleeding yet...that comes in another day or two. i'd go to the store to get some midol, but i'm in too much pain right now.

Curl up into a fetal ball.


I had bad bad cramps a few mos ago. Vicoden made it allllllllllllll better :bouncy:

I have a time tested, proven massage technique that relieves menstrual cramps. You have to have someone else administer the massage and you have to comfortable with being naked with that person and allowing them to touch your body near your nether regions.

the basic concept is simple. You apply gentle to moderate pressure with your fingers (mostly thumbs) to the uterine area. You trace the outline, top down and back up, of the "V" that would be your uterus. You also draw an imaginary line down the center of the V and apply moderate pressure with your thumbs, starting at the imaginary line and push outwards. Then you do the same thing with the V on her back and butt area where the uterus would be.

Guaranteed to work EVERY time. It loosens the muscles that cause the cramping and I've been told that it's almost "orgasmic" at times.

Jenn - Go tell Mr. Sunshine to give you a massage and I hope you feel better honey.

I heard that a punch in the uterus is also quite helpful.

Quote:Originally posted by Grumpy
I have a time tested, proven massage technique that relieves menstrual cramps. You have to have someone else administer the massage and you have to comfortable with being naked with that person and allowing them to touch your body near your nether regions.

the basic concept is simple. You apply gentle to moderate pressure with your fingers (mostly thumbs) to the uterine area. You trace the outline, top down and back up, of the \"V\" that would be your uterus. You also draw an imaginary line down the center of the V and apply moderate pressure with your thumbs, starting at the imaginary line and push outwards. Then you do the same thing with the V on her back and butt area where the uterus would be.

Guaranteed to work EVERY time. It loosens the muscles that cause the cramping and I've been told that it's almost \"orgasmic\" at times.

Jenn - Go tell Mr. Sunshine to give you a massage and I hope you feel better honey.

Thats a long way to go just to get near someones "nether regions" Grump, couldnt you just get a prostitute like normal midgets?

bitch!






but ya got to admit - it's a great setup for getting to know a girl if she's got cramps.

roon - "Hi, my names is roonie"
girl - "Hi, I'm (insert hooker's name here)"
roon - "How are you?"
girl - "I'm cramping and pms'ing"
roon - "ya know - I have this great massage technique that will help get rid of the pain"
girl - "oh?"
roon - "yeah, but you have to be naked and you have to let me touch down there"
girl - "hey, if it works....why not"






girl "by the way - that'll cost you $100"

Quote:Originally posted by Grumpy
bitch!






but ya got to admit - it's a great setup for getting to know a girl if she's got cramps.

roon - \"Hi, my names is roonie\"
girl - \"Hi, I'm (insert hooker's name here)\"
roon - \"How are you?\"
girl - \"I'm cramping and pms'ing\"
roon - \"ya know - I have this great massage technique that will help get rid of the pain\"
girl - \"oh?\"
roon - \"yeah, but you have to be naked and you have to let me touch down there\"
girl - \"hey, if it works....why not\"






girl \"by the way - that'll cost you $100\"

I see youre experienced. :kiss:

Next time strech before you start to menstruate.

Quote:Originally posted by Grumpy

Jenn - Go tell Mr. Sunshine to give you a massage and I hope you feel better honey.

he doesn't know what to do with a tookie, so i doubt he'll be able to work a uterus.