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The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - Dear Grumpy (part II) - aka - Psychos R US

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Displaying 51-67 of 67 messages in this thread.
Posted ByDiscussion Topic: Dear Grumpy (part II) - aka - Psychos R US
Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!
posted on 06-26-2001 @ 3:59 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
Dear Frumpy:

Hi my name is Master Baiter. I am having problems controling myself & my spanking. I need help. All day long I wanna crank one out. Every 10 minutes all I wanna do is spank it. Is there a way you can help me?

Sincerly,

Master


ACCEPTING ADOPTION APPLICATIONS CLICK BELOW
E-Mail Me
1 Tequila, 2 Tequila, 3 Tequila floor
E-Mail Me
AOL - oanda1027fm

FUCK YOU CYCLOPS
Fez
The sky is blue
posted on 06-26-2001 @ 4:01 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Oct. 00
Dear Grumpy,

Frumpy is at it again! Just now he sent over a box of crayons. While I thought it was nice of him, the crayons had obviously been dipped in "man love juice." Also, he sent this note over!



What does this mean? Does 'Grumpy' really want my jizz? I'm not gay, so how should I tell this sword smuggler that I don't want to give him my jizz??

Sincerely,

Thats it I'm getting a restraining order

This message was edited by Fez on 6-26-01 @ 4:05 PM
Grumpy
SAGILLID The Midget Message Board Mauler rides his trusty mount Wilbur once again!! Internet Idiots beware!!
posted on 06-26-2001 @ 4:03 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Dec. 00
Dear Jerkoff,

I've been amazed at the research done on the frequency of masterbation as related to the intellectual level of the individual. Studies have shown that the smarter a person is, the less he or she pleasures him/herself. The less smart they are the more they pleasure themselves.

Based on the frequency that you admit masturbating, you must be one dumb fuck. My suggestion? Read a book once in while.

I hope I've been able to shed some light on your problem.

Grumpy



Newest member of Grumpy's Adopted Midgets: ShavinBush
Any inappropriate behaviour should be reported to me.
If you're having problems with your sig pic site host, feel free to go here: Visit this Website
Alcohol! The ultimate excuse!


Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!
posted on 06-26-2001 @ 4:07 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
quote:

My suggestion? Read a book once in while.


I do read books the titles of the lastest are

"how to have sex with midgets"
"how to have sex with a midgets mom"
"Anal sex with midgets"


ACCEPTING ADOPTION APPLICATIONS CLICK BELOW
E-Mail Me
1 Tequila, 2 Tequila, 3 Tequila floor
E-Mail Me
AOL - oanda1027fm

FUCK YOU CYCLOPS
Grumpy
SAGILLID The Midget Message Board Mauler rides his trusty mount Wilbur once again!! Internet Idiots beware!!
posted on 06-26-2001 @ 4:28 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Dec. 00
Good to see you're furthering your education Jerkoff. I've read all three of those books. Actually I wrote them. (don't tell anyone).

And with this, Grumpy closes up shop. Any questions after this will be duely ignored and possibly answered tomorrow.



Newest member of Grumpy's Adopted Midgets: ShavinBush
Any inappropriate behaviour should be reported to me.
If you're having problems with your sig pic site host, feel free to go here: Visit this Website
Alcohol! The ultimate excuse!


WNEWs GIRL
i don't have a mule but i have a cock
Intercontinental Intergender Thumb Wrestling Champion
CUNT ROCKETTE
The new "third". AmyMohrBuddy

One line in my sig is absolutely fucking disgusting, see if you can find it.
posted on 06-26-2001 @ 5:35 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Aug. 00
dear grumpy,

i didnt wait...if you know what i mean...another keyword, ONLINE, yes...you get what im saying?

signed, A.A.

WHATEVER BEN

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I'M ON THE ISLAND OF MISFIT TOYS!
Famous Giant Hot Dog Molester
"The best lessons in life are also the most painful"
I love Danilo!
Black as Snow
Dont hate me because I'm different...
Hate me because I like to piss people like you off
GOD of PHUK
posted on 06-26-2001 @ 7:26 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: May. 01
Dear Grumpy:

I really, really like fried chicken and watermelons. Am
I black?



Hell, I like you! You
can come over my house and fuck
my sister!

SlartiWHO?
SLARTIBARTFAST!



This message was edited by GOD of PHUK on 6-27-01 @ 1:36 AM
Mr. Brownstone
posted on 06-27-2001 @ 7:41 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Dec. 00
Dear Grumpy,

I recently signed a new contract that takes my radio gig from being a local show to national syndication. In the proccess I get to collect my half of 30 million dollars. My problem is my cunt of an ex-wife, who is trying to lay her grubby little hands on everything I have and everything I will earn in the future. That fucking bitch thinks that because I was kind enough to throw her a bone every once in a while for a few years she somehow is entitled to MY money. The question is what's the best way to get rid of her quickly and quietly with noone knowing it was me. And while I'm at it I want to get rid of her annoying-as-hell drunk-ass mother too. Thank you for your advice.

Sincerely,
AC



There is a theory which states that if anyone discovers exactly what the universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another which staes this has already happened. ---Douglas Adams

Now seeking junior Brownstones to adopt


I see stupid people...They're everywhere...They don't know they're stupid...


This message was edited by Mr. Brownstone on 6-27-01 @ 8:12 AM
Grumpy
SAGILLID The Midget Message Board Mauler rides his trusty mount Wilbur once again!! Internet Idiots beware!!
posted on 06-27-2001 @ 9:05 AM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Dec. 00
Dear Anth... I mean....AC

I feel your pain. Women can be such a pain in the ass sometimes. And I'm not talking about when they put lemons up your ass and ask you to squeeze because you've got a tight ass and they think you can help them make lemonade. I hate it when that happens. What I'm talking about is the domineering "You F me so you owe me" attitude they have. What the F?

Here's what you do. It involves a little percadone, duct tape, a long haired pierced guy that wipes geriatric asses for a living and a digital camera. You invite the bitch, her mom and scary boy over for dinner. Ya pop a few pills in their drinks. They pass out and then the fun begins. Put the tools in "revealing" and "provacative" positions. When they wake up, explain geriatric boy that his ass has vaseline cuz the doctor was just there taking his tempature and he wasn't actually T-bagged. It was only his imagination.

Then tell the two bitches that if they don't disappear off the face of the earth and leave you alone, you'll put their pictures on the local community board website and a popular messageboard site dedicated to two psycho radio disc jockeys.

Please be sure to forward copies of the pics to me first so that I can make the judgement calls of whether or not they are "revealing" enough.

I hope I've been able to shed some light on your problem.

Grumpy

======================================================

CONFIDENTIAL TO KINGPIN

There are several different medications on the market that can help you with your ...uhmm....."stiffening condition" or actually the lack of. See your local pharmacist for further information.



Newest member of Grumpy's Adopted Midgets: ShavinBush
Any inappropriate behaviour should be reported to me.
If you're having problems with your sig pic site host, feel free to go here: Visit this Website
Alcohol! The ultimate excuse!


Mr. Brownstone
posted on 06-27-2001 @ 9:34 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Dec. 00
That sounds great but where do I get a long haired pierced guy from? Do they sell them on ebay?





There is a theory which states that if anyone discovers exactly what the universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another which staes this has already happened. ---Douglas Adams

Now seeking junior Brownstones to adopt


I see stupid people...They're everywhere...They don't know they're stupid...
Kingpin
KEEPER OF THE FLAME.
I have a little Wick.
PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN.
posted on 06-27-2001 @ 5:16 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
Grumpy, I do not need any of those medications, especially when I am buried fist deep into your ass. Then I am hard as a telephone pole and just as thick, that's the way you like it buried, into your mouth. With my balls banging on your chin.




After the fire the fire still burns
The heart grows older but never ever learns
The memories smoulder and the soul always yearns
After the fire the fire still burns

Adopted TonySoprano, if he disrespects you, let me know, I'll find a nice place for him to sleep with the fishes.




E-Mail Me
Grumpy
SAGILLID The Midget Message Board Mauler rides his trusty mount Wilbur once again!! Internet Idiots beware!!
posted on 06-27-2001 @ 5:22 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Dec. 00
Dear Kingpin,

Often when a person helps another person through a traumatic issue, the helpless person gravitates towards the helper in a sexual way. I must say, I'm flattered BUT I'm also straight.

It seems you've woken up on the GEYYYY Side of the bed today. But that's okay. Being honest with yourself if half the battle. Feel free to flaunt your faggieness. Let your emotions flow. Fear not the fallic symbols that's surround. You know they are a part of your soul.

Take heed. Embrace the inner woman in you. You may be surprised at what you find.

I hope I've been able to shed some light on your problem.

Grumpy

PS - My attorneys are in the process of preparing a restraining order against you. Stop calling my house. ;)



Newest member of Grumpy's Adopted Midgets: ShavinBush
Any inappropriate behaviour should be reported to me.
If you're having problems with your sig pic site host, feel free to go here: Visit this Website
Alcohol! The ultimate excuse!


Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!
posted on 06-28-2001 @ 6:11 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
Dear Grumpy,
I am a sailor in the merchant navy. My parents live in Mississauga and one of my sisters, who lives in Toronto, is married to a guy from New Foundland.

My Father and Mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana and are currently dependent on my two sisters, who are prostitutes.
I have two brothers, one who is currently serving
a life sentence in a Winnipeg prison for the rape & murder of a teenage boy in 1994, the other is currently being held in Kingston jail on remand for charges of incest with his three children.
I have recently become engaged to marry a former
Thai prostitute who indeed is still a part time "working girl" in a brothel, however, her
time there is limited as she has recently been infected with an STD.
We intend to marry as soon as possible and are currently looking into the possibility of opening our own brothel with my fiancée utilizing her knowledge of the industry working as the manager. I am hoping my two sisters would be interested in joining our team.
Although I would prefer them not to prostitute themselves, it would at least get them off the streets and hopefully the heroin.
My problem is this: I love my fiancée and look foward to bringing her into the family and of course I want to be totally honest with her. Should I tell her about my brother-in-law being
a Fag?
Just Jon
posted on 06-29-2001 @ 2:48 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Aug. 00
Dear Grumpy,

I was at a local establishment of scantily clad women who dance for money. And as I was watching them (especially a certain blond in a white bodysuit), I got the feeling one of them liked me. Did she really like me? Did she just like me for my money? Should I just ask her if she wants me?

Sincerely,
Delusioned at Double D's

-----

E-mail: [email protected]
AIM: JonNeedsSN
Adoptee: whodawhatawhata and MamA CaZ
You listen to me! While I will admit to a certain cynicism, the fact is I am a nay-sayer and a hatchet man in the fight against violence! I pride myself in taking a punch and I'll gladly take another because I choose to live my life in the company of Gandhi and King! My concerns are global. I reject absolutely revenge, aggression, and retaliation. The foundation of such a method...is love. I love you, Sheriff Truman.
Grumpy
SAGILLID The Midget Message Board Mauler rides his trusty mount Wilbur once again!! Internet Idiots beware!!
posted on 06-29-2001 @ 10:08 AM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Dec. 00
Dear fag navy boy,

As I see it, you only have one alternative to bring your life and the life of your family in order. In Mississuaga, there is a store call Jerry's Ice Cream, Bait and Gun Shop. Ask for Jerry and tell him you'd like to purchase a Glock 9 mm and a box of hollow point bullets. About 12 should suffice for what you'll need and should cost you about $600 or so. Tell Jerry "the midget" sent ya. You'll get a free sundae and 1/4 lb of night crawlers for using my name.

Now, put the bullets in the gun. First shoot yourself in the foot. Feel the pain. Get used to it. Then gradually, move up every 12 inches and fire another round (*two for the groin area) finally culminating at your temple. Finally, in words of the great Otto and George: Get in the coffin. Die!

I hope I've been able to shed some light on your problem.

Grumpy

==============================================

Dear Delusional at DD,

Ahhhh yes. I feel your pain. Truly I do. As one who is constantly clamoured by the likes of supermodels and classy "exotic" dancers, it's difficult for the poor souls not to admire the beauty that is ME.

When frequenting these types of establishment, for research purposes only of course, my personal preference gravitates towards the tall, lanky, latin looking women, with tight bodies that gyrate in ways that defy the laws of physics and gravity. Reddish Auborn haired one are especially prone to my boyish good looks and charm. I know they want me.

So yes, she wanted you. You should ask openly. And if she laughs, it's not out of ridicule, it's out of shyness. Consider it that shy girlish giggle thing that they do, but louder, realllly louder.

I hope I've been able to shed some light on your problem.

Grumpy






Newest member of Grumpy's Adopted Midgets: ShavinBush
Any inappropriate behaviour should be reported to me.
If you're having problems with your sig pic site host, feel free to go here: Visit this Website
Alcohol! The ultimate excuse!


bluetarp
posted on 06-29-2001 @ 10:39 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Jan. 01
Dear Grumpster,
I am a typically full blown asshole. Recently however, I just haven't had it in me to really berate anybody lately. I keep thinking about how it might hurt there feelings and shit. Other than double dosing stacker 2 tabs, or other chemically induced anger, what should I do?


Heaaa fishy fishy fishy fishy. And it went, wherever I, did go!
Grumpy
SAGILLID The Midget Message Board Mauler rides his trusty mount Wilbur once again!! Internet Idiots beware!!
posted on 06-29-2001 @ 12:03 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Dec. 00
Dear Blueshit,

There are several different alternatives. The first is to visit the YESYOUARE farm. It specializes in people with personal issues. They have this great pool that you can swim in and relax with all the chicks around you. By the way - the bonus is that it's a nudist farm so the ladies roam naked. Just don't let the fact that they weigh over 300 lbs each bother you.

The second alternative is very painful and I won't get into details. It involves clothes pins, your junk, a 5 lb weight and a trip through bed stuy. I don't think you're up to it. Stick to the spa.

I hope I've been able to shed some light on your problem.

Grumpy




Newest member of Grumpy's Adopted Midgets: ShavinBush
Any inappropriate behaviour should be reported to me.
If you're having problems with your sig pic site host, feel free to go here: Visit this Website
Alcohol! The ultimate excuse!




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Displaying 51-67 of 67 messages in this thread.