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The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - how r the sexists today?

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Displaying 26-50 of 118 messages in this thread.
Posted ByDiscussion Topic: how r the sexists today?
krahzee
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:46 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 02
Q. Why don't women wear watches?
A. There's already a clock on the stove.

barch97
BBTB
The barch gots lots a dick
Theoretically, if I were to smack you in the face with my penis, it would leave a bruise in the shape of a mushroom.
I kind of enjoy my anonymity on the board
WOW Forum Ambassador		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:48 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jul. 00
Q. What do 80% of battered women have in common?
A. They don't fuckin' listen.




Long Live the "Syndication Underground"
The Painter
1/2 a bottle of Jack Daniels... it's a cure-all		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:49 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Sep. 00
Q: Why don't women have brains?
A: They don't have a penis to put them in.


I have walked through many lives
Some of them my own
And I am not who I was
Though some principle of being abides
From which I struggle not to stray

Doc Smith
I Love Anthony Zinni 		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:50 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Sep. 00
Q: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

A: Nothing, you already told her twice


I wish I were telepathic.
Not just to read people's minds, but to cut down on my cell phone bill
krahzee
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:51 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 02
Q. What do you call a woman with two brain cells?
A. Pregnant.

Leaking Nipples
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:52 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 01
What's the difference between William Shatner and OJ Simpson?

Shatner did it the right way.

Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:56 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
What's the first this a women does after returning home from the abuse clinic?

The dishes if she knows what's good for her


LET’S GO ISLANDERS!!!!!

E-Mail Me
Want to do shots?

barch97
BBTB
The barch gots lots a dick
Theoretically, if I were to smack you in the face with my penis, it would leave a bruise in the shape of a mushroom.
I kind of enjoy my anonymity on the board
WOW Forum Ambassador		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:56 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jul. 00
Q. What's the first thing a battered woman does after returning home from the hospital?
A. The dishes, if she knows what's good for her.

Fuckin' mexican...


Q. Why do men fart more than women?
A. Because women won't shut up long enough to build up pressure.



Long Live the "Syndication Underground"


This message was edited by barch97 on 3-22-02 @ 9:36 PM
Leaking Nipples
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:56 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 01
What do you buy for a battered woman?

A damn hearing aid.

krahzee
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:56 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 02
Q. Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A. So they can stand closer to the sink.

krahzee
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:58 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 02
Q. How do you know a woman is about to say something smart?
A. She starts her sentence with " A man once told me..."


Did you here that there are female hormones in Beer? Yeah, they had 100 guys drink ten beers each. They started running thier mouths and driving lousy.

Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 8:58 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
Why do women wear white when they get married?

All household appliances come in white.


LET’S GO ISLANDERS!!!!!

E-Mail Me
Want to do shots?

Leaking Nipples
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:03 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 01
What's the best way to deal with marital troubles?

Ask OJ.

krahzee
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:03 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 02
women are like guns, keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it.

crx girl
Newbie! vg Y's me
ugo girl
Limey Mothercocker 		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:04 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
quote:
ask any real man..........a housewife with kids is sexier and hotter than any professional lap dancing whore.
and that's why married men will go to a strip club at every chance they get.

silera rules!!!!!111

edit: sorry to interrupt your little comedy fest. please don't beat me



"cheer up, things could be worse - you could have been born british!";) seph rocks
need me? try: crxgirl@opieanthony.com

This message was edited by crx girl on 3-22-02 @ 9:07 PM
Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:04 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
Dear Tide,
I have always used your product ever since my college days, because mom says it was the best. One weekend about a month ago, I was at my girlfriend's place, wearing my new white shirt. Much to my chagrin, I spilled some red wine on my white shirt. She made a comment about my drinking problem, one thing lead to another, and soon I had her blood all over my not-so-nice white shirt. I tried washing it with her detergent, and it just didn't do the trick. So, on my way home, I stopped at the store and picked up a box of new Ultra Tide. It washed the stain so well that the DNA tests were entirely inconclusive! I can't praise your product enough. Thank you for saving my life! I must go now. I also have to send my praise to the makers of Hefty garbage bags...

Thanks again!

Tequila



LET’S GO ISLANDERS!!!!!

E-Mail Me
Want to do shots?

krahzee
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:06 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 02
Q. What did Nicole Brown Simpson say to Kato?
A. You can eat the Pussy, but the juice will kill ya.

diceisgod
I ALWAYS LOSE.		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:07 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Dec. 01
quote:
how r the sexists today?
Nawt bad. So how r u chrissy g reincarnated?


Nobody fucks with Dice, Dice does the fuckin!
you know that it would be untrue you know that i would be a liar if i were to say to you i didn't set your house on fire but it's just the way i am you'll have to take it for a fact life can really burn you up when you're a pyromaniac if you love somebody better set them on fire i went to your house last night your dad called me the human torch got a little pissed at him so i burned down your front porch now i feel a little bad about pouring gas on your dad but you know it's hard to quit and besides he started it i just bought a brand new lighter and i cannot wait to use it with a can of kerosene it's lots of fun you can't refuse it oily rags are special things you know to me they're diamond rings maybe we can have some fun maybe we can burn someone if you love somebody better set them on fire if you love somebody why not set them on fire you know that it would be untrue you know that i would be a liar if i were to say to you i didn't set your dad on fire if you love somebody better set them on fire if you love somebody why not set them on fire if you love somebody better set them on fire if you love somebody why not set them on fire
Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:08 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
Q: What do a woman, a tornado and a hurricane have in common?

A: They all get the house!



LET’S GO ISLANDERS!!!!!

E-Mail Me
Want to do shots?

barch97
BBTB
The barch gots lots a dick
Theoretically, if I were to smack you in the face with my penis, it would leave a bruise in the shape of a mushroom.
I kind of enjoy my anonymity on the board
WOW Forum Ambassador		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:13 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jul. 00
Q. How can you tell when trixeee's not wearin' panties?
A. Dandriff on her shoes.

Yeah, I know that one was pretty weak but, I'm runnin' dry here. Hopin to get the creativity flowin' again.



Long Live the "Syndication Underground"
Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:14 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
Why did God give women arms?

Do you have any idea how long it would take to lick a bathroom clean?



LET’S GO ISLANDERS!!!!!

E-Mail Me
Want to do shots?

Leaking Nipples
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:16 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 01
What's the difference between a prostitue and a wife?

A prostitute is cheaper.

Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:17 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
Q: How do you know when an Trickseeee has her period?
A: She's only wearing one sock.




LET’S GO ISLANDERS!!!!!

E-Mail Me
Want to do shots?

Leaking Nipples
posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:20 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 01
What's the difference between a wife that gives hummers on a regualr basis and the Great Wall of China?

The Great Wall of China actually exists.

Doc Smith
I Love Anthony Zinni 		posted on 03-22-2002 @ 9:20 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Sep. 00
What do you do when your dishwasher is loaded?

Tell the bitch to sober up and finish dinner


I wish I were telepathic.
Not just to read people's minds, but to cut down on my cell phone bill


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Displaying 26-50 of 118 messages in this thread.