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		Yesterday I was hungry, so I put some garlic bread in the microwave, and then ate it. But that didn't completely hit the spot so I put a pizza in the oven. Half an hour later my dad comes back and asks me if I've eaten, and I say "yea, I just had pizza". Then he goes into the kitchen and sees that I have yet to take the pizza out of the oven and it has been burned. He yells this to me, and I'm preplexed. For some reason I had convinced myself I had already eaten the pizza. And then I realized that the garlic bread aftertaste that was in my mouth was what did that. So I ended up eating the burnt pizza and it wasn't so bad.
	
	
	
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		and then I smeared a bearclaw in my dad's face
	
	
	
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		That'll show him.
The bastard.
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		If I were you, I would have put the garlic bread in the toaster oven instead.
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		I don't have a toaster oven, I think there is a toaster, but the slices of garlic bread were pretty thick. But point taken.
	
	
	
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		you're going to burn your house down one day.
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		was it a plain pizza, or did it have toppings?
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		My parents came home with the groceries one time.  As was often the case, when I was unsure where to put something away, I would ask "where does this go" and she would tell me.  Well, on this day my mother had just bought new ice cube trays, and I asked "where do you want these?".  My father looked at me and said "in the oven" like a wiseass.
So I put them in the oven since he was being an ass.
Then a couple days later, my mother heated up the oven and melted the ice cube trays.  I think a new oven was required.
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		Did you need new ice trays too?
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		I was driving a few minutes ago and I very lazily spit out the window when i was stopped at a red light. It's windy as fuck here right now, so the spittle went out the window, stopped mid-air and looped up, and flew right back in my car and on my steering wheel. It's trajectory was nearly a perfect circle and it seemed like it was in slow motion, I swear I could see my reflection in one of the little spit bubbles as flew back at me.
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		you wear a motorcycle helmet yet drive a car?
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		someone has a disfigurement
	
	
	
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		ive never owned a toaster oven in my life. they look handy but tough to clean.
	
	
	
	
	
 
 
	
	
	
		
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		on most of them the bottom opens up for easy cleaning. 
& the rack comes out no problem.
	
	
	
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<Goatweed> Titty McCheesehater