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Contacts - Those fuckin things
#4
AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! I went through the same shit when I first got my lenses. You get used to putting them in pretty quickly.

One thing goochy, you might want to think twice about wearing them to work. It turns out, when you look at a computer screen you don't blink nearly as much because of the refresh rate. This causes your eyes to dry and makes contacts pretty uncomfortable if you don't put drops in regularly. And judging by your flinchtastic description of putting in the lenses, I'm guessing you're just about as good with eye drops. :-o

Did they teach you the wrestling pose you need just to hold your eye open?
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