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| Posted By | Discussion Topic: This is my last week as a free man. | ||||
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| SpiritOfDirt | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:12 AM |    | |||
| Psychopath Registered: May. 01  | Well this is it. Saturday, June 30th, 4:00 pm I will be taking the eternal plung into marriage. From what I hear from married men is that I am a dumbass and it's not too late to run. From what I hear from women is that it is the best thing for me. I think it will be great and it will be a happy occassion, but also I hear that's what they all say. Any suggestions from you fellow married people?  THE ROOT OF THE PROBLEM HAS BEEN ISOLATED .......Proud graduate of the Spitfire421 school of altered reality....... | ||||
| SNAKEBITE | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:21 AM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Jan. 01 | Welcome to the club dude!! If you think marriage is gona be bad, wait until you have kids!! lol Just remember there are always 3 sides to every story--- yours, hers and the lawyers. Good luck Remember don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things | ||||
| King f-tard | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:21 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Feb. 01 | Nope, not yet, I have another year and 2 months yesterday till I go the same route. Good luck. | ||||
USA Autoban Head Slap... Swim Move... | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:30 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Oct. 00 | Duck and cover. | ||||
| MaynardGKrebs | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:37 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Jan. 01 | [monty python voice]Run Away![/Monty Python voice] | ||||
| hornygoatweed23 I've Got A Vagina With Teeth. G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S. Dragoon Battalion My friends call me Weed | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:39 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | I'm taking the plunge as well Dirt - three weeks to go. All the advice I have been given is to run far and fast - obviously, thats not going to happen. What I will say is that if I ever have to go through this again, I will not go along with all the hype involved. Planning, organizing and actually paying for a goddamn wedding has to be one of the worst things to deal with - not only is most of it all for the bride, but its expensive as hell, and theres not a damn thing you can do about it. Oh yeah, congrats - I wish you luck (becuase like me, you're probably going to need it) LMMFYO!!  Classes for Enhancing your Board Experience and Stamina are now in Session! Email me here or AIM me at Organic999 to enroll. | ||||
| o&aswallow | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:40 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | Will they ever learn??? See those hills boy? Run there now!!!! As of Saturday, you will forever loose a minimum of half of everything you ever had and will ever have. You will never get laid as much as you have to this point in your life. And you will get bitched at for every breath you take, everything you do and every move you make will be wrong. But oh yeah, you will be different. Yours will be the one that works out great. (snicker, snicker). Good luck dude.  o&aswallow Recognized His Destiny Early. Too Many Hotties, Not Enough Horny Goat Weed Now accepting foster children applications. Cash only, no checks. Email at onaswallow@opieanthony.com Pia has occupied one of the foster bedrooms as of 6/22/01. If she is naughty, I'll do the spanking. TwatGunk has been released from foster custody and has been thrown to wolves like the rest of us. It at first you don't succeed, keep on sucking till you do suck seed. - Curly Howard. Pennsylvania resident, but original NYC listener. | ||||
| Ronreddog | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:48 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00 | Hey, Spirit, first of all, CONGRATS! Second, have you been fitted for the Ball and Chain yet? lol Finally, it is not so bad. The first month or so, the sex will be great. Then, the plunge! If you are lucky, you will get some once a month, while spanking it twice a day! LMMFYBO Seriously, best wishes! :)  Sig pic courtesy of the recently resurrected CBH, one sick F! Please WOW this bully today! E-Mail Me | ||||
| adolescentmasturbator | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:51 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | I thought you were going to prison. My advice was going to be get laid and don't show your weakness. I guess the advice still applies. Resident Board Socialist Email me here IM me at stickysituation2 or pinkorag I have brought the 3 i's of SamH and ass-fucker into the International | ||||
| o&aswallow | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 10:07 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | quote: If he has any luck at all, he will before Saturday. o&aswallow Recognized His Destiny Early. Too Many Hotties, Not Enough Horny Goat Weed Now accepting foster children applications. Cash only, no checks. Email at onaswallow@opieanthony.com Pia has occupied one of the foster bedrooms as of 6/22/01. If she is naughty, I'll do the spanking. TwatGunk has been released from foster custody and has been thrown to wolves like the rest of us. It at first you don't succeed, keep on sucking till you do suck seed. - Curly Howard. Pennsylvania resident, but original NYC listener. | ||||
| Grumpy SAGILLID The Midget Message Board Mauler rides his trusty mount Wilbur once again!! Internet Idiots beware!! | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 10:09 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Dec. 00 | Dirt - ma boy! Allow me to give you the secrets to a happy long marriage. It's very simple, just a plain set of 2 words. Learn them, live them, have them tattooed on your forehead. Yes Dear! I'm sorry! You're Right! Use them liberally and in combination. It doesn't matter if you mean them or not. Your ass is now grass. Get used to it. LMMFAO. All kidding aside, good luck bro. Congrats and welcome to the Ball and Chain Club. [Queen - Freddy Mercury]Anotha one bites the dust! Anotha one bites the dust. And another one gone and another gone! another one bites the dust!......[/Queen]  Newest member of Grumpy's Adopted Midgets: ShavinBush Any inappropriate behaviour should be reported to me. If you're having problems with your sig pic site host, feel free to go here: Visit this Website Alcohol! The ultimate excuse! | ||||
| Kim | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 10:11 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | Women have the same feelings...who wants to have to pick up your underwear...be pregnant for nine months...listen to you bitch about hating what is fixed for dinner...the scratching,adjusting and touching...I could go on...lolol and the sex thing...Maybe if more men knew how to please their woman they'd have sex more often... ;)  "Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly." | ||||
| adolescentmasturbator | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 10:21 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | quote: He would just become someone else's bitch. Resident Board Socialist Email me here IM me at stickysituation2 or pinkorag I have brought the 3 i's of SamH and ass-fucker into the International | ||||
| allyourbasearebelongtous | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 10:23 AM | | |||
| Hanger-On Registered: Apr. 01 | quote: I don't think this is entirely the man's fault. A lot of times, the women are afraid to tell their men what they want. Us men can be idiots, but we usually follow directions pretty well, especially if we're naked :) I don't know about the other men on this board, but I find it a real turn on when my wife opens up to me and tells me how and why she wants things done in bed. Anyway, regarding the post... I got married last October. True, the divorce rate of this country is very high, but as a person that has been married for about 8 months, marriage is not as bad as some would have you believe. The secret to being happy is don't spend every damn minute with her. You're suppose to be toeghter for the rest of your life, so taking a break from her isn't going to kill her. Just because you are married doesn't mean that you can't spend time doing things you like to do. My wife doesn't find any of my hobbies interesting, so she lets me spend time with them while she does the things I have no iterest in doing, such as going shopping with her at the mall. It really helps if your future in-laws are cool people too. Remember this - This is YOUR family, NOT your parent's or your In-laws. If they get too intrusive, tell them to butt the hell out. You're adults now, and you can do things your way. You will notice that you're social life will change a little. You will spend more time with couples than with single people. Also, if you plan on having children, decide when you are going to have them and stick to it. No matter how much she wants them, don't have them until you have spent some time together by yourself. Personally, I think it should be illegal to have kids until you have been married for at least 2 years. She will really start to want them when all her friends start having them, so expect that little shit storm when you notice how all her friends start to get pregnant. Also, make sure you guys talk to each other, and don't be afraid to tell her anything. You can't have a marriage if you don't keep the lines of communicaton open. Oh, one more thing, after you guys have a fight (and you will fight), and you make up, fuck like rabbits. Good luck, and I hope you guys have a happy life together. allyourbasearebelongtous  This message was edited by allyourbasearebelongtous on 6-25-01 @ 10:32 AM | ||||
| SpiritOfDirt | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 10:33 AM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: May. 01 | I don't know whether to laugh or cry yet. Keep 'em coming. THE ROOT OF THE PROBLEM HAS BEEN ISOLATED .......Proud graduate of the Spitfire421 school of altered reality....... | ||||
| HUMMERS4ALL | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 10:33 AM | | |||
| Hanger-On Registered: Sep. 00 | DON'T DO IT!!!! and that's from a females point of view!  Graduated by adolescentmasturbator :) sig pic done by adolescentmasturbator | ||||
| Ronreddog | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 10:48 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00 | LMAO @ Grumpy! I forgot those! Also, the wife is 99.9% right. You really need to celebrate the 0.1% time that you are right, since it is so rare! At least you will control the remote! You'll have the remote in one hand, and your dick in the other! LMMFYBO Sig pic courtesy of the recently resurrected CBH, one sick F! Please WOW this bully today! E-Mail Me | ||||
| kevin from ct
| posted on 06-25-2001 @ 11:11 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Sep. 00 | Here's my take on it... I think in terms of life changing getting married rates about a four on a scale of one to ten. Then...The first kid kills her drive for sex. The second kid kills the retirement plans. And the third kid destroys your liver completely. But I'm not bitter or anything.. | ||||
| Banana_juice | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 11:14 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | I have never been married so i have nothing bad to say, so congratulations E-Mail Me special thanks to maynard and grumpy for the sig pic and the help posting it | ||||
| ass-fucker | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 12:56 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Jan. 01 | i never been married, but i have some advice anyways. if you ever want to go to twe strip club with the boys make sure you don't mention it to your wife until after you come back because it's easier to get forgiveness than permission. and also if things don't work out so well (i hope they do) remember: women are like buses, another one comes every 20 minutes. congratulations!!  adopted by adolecentmaturbator This message was edited by ass-fucker on 6-28-01 @ 11:12 PM | ||||
| Sloatsburgh | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 1:45 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00 | View marriage and life like this: Life is a big bowl of shit in a toliet and marriage is the plunger. You have to grab the plunger and get shit all over your face because the othert option (just constantly shitting in a full toliet) is even worse. So go ahead and plunge the shit. If you're lucky and good and don't shit on life too much, then the shit will not build up again (or back up) and you'll only have to plunge it once. Think about it the Guilliani way: you want a wife there (and not a pretentious actress one) so that when you start throwing up on yourself, someone will wipe off your mouth.  220, 221, whatever it takes. | ||||
| Mayor of Sloatsburg | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 2:13 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Oct. 00 | Great post SOD. Less than three months left for me (09/22/2001), and this friggin thing has left me broke and crazy. Best of luck to you, King f-tard and hornygoatweed23. "Have you talked to your doctor about Stacker 2?" | ||||
| F the S out of her A | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 2:54 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Jun. 01 | Coming up on being married nine months (9/30/00) and am passing along some advice sent to me from a man married 25 years... 1. Wait a couple of years before having children, even if you have lived together for a while. Get used to being married and enjoy one another. 2. Figure out who is the giver and who is the taker; two of the same kind cannot live together and the roles may change hands, but figure out who is who when and where. Hope that makes sense. 3. While I maintain my friendships with the single guys, I have had to make room for the other couples. Your new bride will like it when you hold other people's kids, but still hold off for a couple of years. 4. Figure out the expenses early - usually, one spouse handles those, so figure out who it will be. And these are mine: - I have found that keeping the mindset that this is FOR LIFE helps you stay in the argument until the resolution. - You always have someone in your corner now, so taking on larger projects and being more adult in your life starts to happen. - Waiting to have children leaves lots of time for the Mile High Club, roadhummers, vacations at the drop of a hat, etc., so heed the advice of the above. - You will be getting really nervous towards the end of this week. If you can, see if your best man can shuttle you around; I found that driving my car was a little nerve-wracking. I was afraid I was going to get into an accident and be floored up and miss the wedding. - Remember, Saturday is the day you are a celebrity. Enjoy it. Try to stay somewhat sober so you can remember what everyone has to say about you. Your wedding day and your funeral are the only times everyone has something GOOD to say about you. - As for in-laws, I have it easy, because my mother-in-law does not speak English. I am learning Spanish and, as a Christmas gift, she and I will be speaking without my wife translating for the first time. [I guess the moral of the above is that giving to the in-laws is a good thing, or something] Oops, the show is on, so I gotta get going... Good luck! Adopted by JonBenet Norton as a career Padawan... ONE BURBON, ONE SCOTCH AND ONE BEER | ||||
| Sluggo667 SLASH's New Buddy, but shhh... I am not allowed to tell anyone. | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 4:05 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Apr. 01 | Congrats SOD...I've been married for 7 years now,and,let me tell you,it hasn't been all fun...;) You just have to remember...The one who says "I'm sorry"first...WINS!!! Seriously,good luck,don't listen to all of the guys that tell you to run,that now half of what you now earn and own is hers...if you're like me,SHE's making WAY more money than you and with the two combined...you can do pretty good! Really,I wouldn't change a thing about my life now WELCOME TO THE INSTITUTION!  Sluggo667...Neighbor of the beast... | ||||
| Raven Portugal | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 8:44 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: May. 01 | welcome to HELL Nuff said if need E-Mail Me "We all need... a haven. A sanctuary. A place to hide. A place to escape. A place to dream and hope. A place... where the darkness won't be so frightening. But for some, the darkness is a relentless enemy. It cannot be eluded. And once the darkness senses your fear; once it senses your pain, it is never far behind. I can empathize with these people. I can understand their futility. I can forgive their hopelessness. I feel their pain. Quote the Raven, nevermore." | ||||
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