SO I'm fucking this girl.

Email I was sent below. !.


Subject: Left brain, right brain


Interesting...

Left brain, right brain. While sitting at your desk or whatever you can find, lift your
right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles. Now, while doing
this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. Your foot will
change direction and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it.

This WILL drive you crazy.

Well, last week I had some nice black hash from the Middle East. It was soft and malleable, and came off a key that was stamped with a gold bengal tiger. Fucking ILL. Take a li'l piece, pop it inna glass pipe, and you're good to go. Nice body high, feelin' good.

Then I got to have a nice piece of Lebanese Brown hash. This stuff is harder, you break a small piece, hold it to a flame and it crumbles into a nice dust to be sprinkled atop a bowl or into a joint. You can just put the piece in a bowl but it doesn't burn anywhere near as nice as the black.

In conclusion, I'll stick with the black when I can get it. I suggest you all do the same. :15:

So..what will happen today??

Get it!?!!

So my mom works at a beauty spa and her boss is a major cunt as most bosses are. She's been bustin her chops for years and this week was bad between them.

So anyway they were talking today during lunch time. Her boss all of a sudden goes into a whole religious schpeel on how god sees all and he punishes the bad and rewards the good, like her. She says that god visits her every night and tells her how to make money and how to live a good life, arpi would love her cause she measures success by her bank account totals.

At that same moment two cop cars pull into the lot and two guys in suits walk in followed by 5 uniformed officers. The boss lady says "ohh somebody musta fucked up bad".. if she only knew.

Turns out someone snitched her out that she was selling bootleg shit in the spa. So the guys in the suits show their ID's and say they are F.B.I. Turns out she would get those fake name brand purses from canal street and sell them in the store. But then she figured why go through a middle man. So she'd buy some cheap purses for like 10 bucks and she put some spic in the basement and had her stitch on the emblems and stuff on the purses. As well as clothes and other stuff like wallets, etc.

So she says she has to go to the bathroom and when she comes out the place wreaks of doo doo and she is all broken out in hives. So she calls up her husband and he comes down.

Now I cant stand her husband, he thinks he is such a big shot but he'd still be selling hot dogs on the street if not for marrying her.

This genius thinks he is john gotti or something, like someone knows his name. So he walks up to the FBI agents and says "look, it's ok I am her partner". They just look at him as if he is the biggest moron in the world. They tell him so you just admitted to be in on this with her? He says yeah, it's ok. So he ends up being taken in with her and they didnt even come for him.

Good times!!!

So she asked my mom for help to call her lawyer. So my mom says "sure thing, i'll even give you some advice now. Plead insanity, say that when god comes to talk to you every night he told you to make bootleg purses. No jury in the world will think you are sane. Make sure to act like you normally do to make it seem more credible".

discuss

I can cook so many amazing things.

But I forgot how to boil an egg

do you boil the water first and then put the egg in

or do you throw the egg in and let the water boil

how long do you boil it for?

where is silera or eric when I need them!!!

remember that mouse i talked about seeing a few weeks ago


now its dead

Now that the assimilation has begun, are goat, arpi, and galt the only opposition? I wish more a challenge. After hearing this place talked up so much, I must say, Ive been disappointed thus far. Ill mow arpi and galt down and leave goat to tell their tale. Kinda like Steve Buscemi in Desperado.(<--- I did that for you Gonzo)