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<font size=3>WEDNESDAY 7:10 PM EST!!</font>

Triple H appeared on TSN's Off the Record show this evening. It was a great interview where Triple H talked about the MSG incident, Shawn Michaels being sent home last year and more. Here is a quick recap:

- They immediately start talking about the quad injury and Michael asks Triple H if he's surprised he's even here. Triple H says he's a little bit surprised but at first, he didn't think the tear was as bad as it was. They couldn't tell because of the swelling but after the first few days, they realized it was very serious. But luckily, he had good people working with him and he's back.

- Landsberg talks about how the match didn't even stop when Triple H got injured. Triple H comments that he knew immediately, it felt like lighting hit his thigh. He knew he was badly hurt but the show just goes on. He said it never crossed his mind to stop. They show the clips of Jericho giving him the Walls of Jericho and Triple H comments that at one point, Jericho asks him if he's hurt and what to do and Triple H responded by saying to just keep going. He said after that move, he still had to get back in the ring and do another spot but he was just hoping for the match to end.

- They talk about the 1996 MSG incident where Hall, Nash, Shawn Michaels and Triple H all met for a group hug after the event. Triple H admits that he got punished for doing that but Shawn had previously asked Vince if he could do it and Vince said yes. But it got out of hand because Vince thought they were just gonna stand apart and point at each other. When they came back to the backstage area, he could sense there was heat but the fallout was felt a few days later. Shawn was the champion and untouchable so all the heat fell on Triple H. Triple H says that it wouldn't have mattered if Shawn got punished as well.

- They talk about last year when Shawn Michaels came to the WWF in no shape to work and the company sent him home. Triple H says that Michaels came because of Triple H's word, he talked to people and smoothed things over - basically it was his idea to bring Shawn back. But the company made a decision not to use him and he had to side with the company especially after seeing Shawn. Although not wanting to get into specifics, Triple H stated that anyone who saw Shawn would have had a tough time not siding with the company - it was that bad.

- Michael talks about Triple H and Stephanie dating and asks how it started and how he broke the news to Vince. Triple H stated that it just started after all the time they spent together. They were similar and shared a passion for the business. Triple H goes on to say that Vince was watching them and he may have known even before them.

- Landsberg asks if backstage they act like boyfriend/girlfriend. Triple H says no, around business they try to act professionally and business-like.

- Landsberg asks if he was ever worried about what the other wrestlers thought, in light of the fact that they are both creative writers for the company. Triple H says yes at first he was but it was Vince who convinced him otherwise. He also says that the Undertaker also convinced him otherwise, saying no one has a right to challenge his work ethic or question that he earned to get to where he is.

- Landsberg questions what will happen if things don't work out, it will be a conflict of interest and his reputation could be shot. Triple H says that yeah, it will be difficult but he will deal with it when and if it happens. He's already beat up Vince once and he'll do it again. Landsberg asks him what if it did happen, what would he do and Triple H says it would just depend on the circumstances.

- They show a clip of Joanie Laurer (Chyna) on Off the Record and how she blames Triple H for their relationship. Triple H says sure, if she wants to blame someone blame him. He says that their relationship was going down for a while before that because this business is tough on relationships because you're around each other 24/7. Triple H says that Joanie doesn't realize that things just weren't working out from before but he wishes her the best of luck in the future. If she has anger, he understands it but no one forced her to do anything.

- Landsberg talks about how his private life is basically being showcased on public TV. Wouldn't it be easier to find someone who wasn't in the business and the whole world wouldn't see it evolve? Triple H says that when you are so passionate for this business, how do you find someone who understands the business, understands your passions and isn't with you just because of who you are. It's difficult to find someone who shares the same passion for something as you.

- Viewer questions are up next. The first one asks who Triple H's favorite person to work with. Triple H says this is a tough question and in fact, he talked to Ric Flair about this same thing the other day. Triple H says that everyone has a different style, but he loved working with Mick Foley because of the hardcore direction, the Rock because of the showmanship, Undertaker because it was classic old school style and Steve Austin because it was down and dirty fighting. Everyone has their own style.

- They talk about Ric Flair and how Triple H studies his tapes. Triple H admits to this saying that Flair was one of the greatest ever and his ring presence was just phenonemal. Triple H says that no one influenced him anymore than did Flair and that his in-ring work is unmatched.

- Another reader question asks who would win in a real life ultimate brawl in the WWF. Triple H says it's hard to stay because every wrestler has a different style of fighting. Triple H says maybe Kurt Angle, but could he take Big Show down and beat him up. They talk about how Undertaker would love to take Show down and beat him up and Triple H says that he probably could. He names a few more like Bradshaw and Faarooq who are legitimately tough.

- Another question asks if he's upset that the Hogan-Rock match is the headliner at Wrestlemania. Triple H says no he's not upset but he's disappointed that his match with Jericho hasn't had a better build to it. This is Hogan's return to the WWF match (and he compares Michael Jordan's return to basketball) and says that even though it may be the headliner, it doesn't necessarily mean it's the best match or the best wrestler.

- Next question asks what safety net the WWF has for bookers to push themselves. Triple H says that Vince McMahon is the safety net. He says that despite what you hear elsewhere, Vince McMahon has final say. He has control and acts as a filter. To make money in wrestling, you can't do it yourself. You need someone just as over to work with and it's beneficial for him to have as many guys at the top to work with as possible.

- They talk about Chris Jericho and how close he is to the top. Triple H says that it's difficult to say but he believes that Chris is just a step below the top tier. He doesn't know but there's just a piece of the puzzle missing but he believes Jericho will get it. It doesn't happen all at once but when it happens, it will happen fast.

- They talk about guys just underneath Jericho who could move up a level. Triple H mentions Test and Edge who could move up a tier in the roster. But there is always one guy who no one expects who could move up immediately.

- Landsberg talks about his original character, the blue-blood snob Hunter Hearst Helmsley. Triple H says that back then, everyone came in with a gimmick - a firefighter, a garbageman, etc. But he's happy he got out of that role, even though it took a while, because it was so limiting in what he could do.

- Michael thanks Triple H for doing the interview and says that he was amazing.

- Hulk Hogan is telling people that he has a broken rib, which he picked up before a recent 3-day-workout session with the Rock. Also, Hogan and Rock have set out the plans for their match this Sunday, and both men are said to be happy.

- Apparently, Kevin Nash is upset with his current WWF schedule. He has been heard telling people that he is unhappy with having to work 20 shows over the past month, even though his contract only requires him to work 12 shows per month.

- It is being reported that Steve Austin is also upset. It is unknown what he is upset over, but it's most likely that he isn't happy with the WWF's current direction. He has made his feelings clear to Vince on several occassions.

- Vince McMahon is pushing the nWo very hard backstage. A lot of people have noticed that the nWo are currently his "pet project." It is well documented that Vince takes a lot of interest in the storylines of his top stars.

- Former WWF champion Bret Hart called into the Much Music's "Much On Demand" show yesterday afternoon. He was asked the usual questions, and about the "Legends Of Wrestling" video game. When asked who he thought was the biggest punk in wrestling, Hart said he thinks Triple H is.

- There are apparently no plans to bring back Shawn Michaels in a significant way. Rumors indicate that Michaels still has some heat with Triple H since Shawn believes that Triple H bad-mouthed him last year April. Furthermore, reports indicate that last week when Michaels was backstage at the Smackdown! show, he did not hang out with Triple H, prompting friends of both to state that there is still tension between the two.

- The WWF is still telling wrestlers to expect the roster split to occur shortly after Wrestlemania.

- The nWo are pushing hard backstage for the return of X-Pac. Their tactics seem to have worked, as many think that X-Pac will be back within a week. There is a possibility of X-Pac interfering in Scott Hall's match with Austin at WrestleMania, causing Hall to win. X-Pac would then come out with Hall & Nash the next night in Montreal. This idea has upset some people backstage, since X-Pac would be leap-frogging wrestlers who have been working hard to get over.

Because you hate them SOOO much..

Personally Chaka Khan's "I feel for you" drove me insane.. I can't understand how that song was popular at all

And this has got to be one of the ridiculously longest set of song lyrics EVER.....
(yes, this is ONE song)


Way back when I was just a little bitty boy living in a box under the stairs in the corner of the basement half a block down the street from Jerry's Bait shop
You know the place
well anyway, back then life was going swell and everything was just peachy

Except, of course, for the undeniable fact that every single morning
My mother would make me a big bowl of sauerkraut for breakfast

Awww - Big bowl of sauerkraut
Every single mornin
It wa driving me crazy

I said to my mom
I said "Hey, mom, what's with all the sauerkraut?"
And my dear, sweet mother
She just looked at my like a cow looks at an oncoming train
And she leaned right down next to me
And she said "IT'S GOOD FOR YOU"
And then she tied me to the wall and stuck a funnel in my mouth
And force fed me nothing but sauerkraut until I was twenty six and a half years old

That's when I swore that someday
Someday I would get outta that basement and travel to a magical, far away place
Where the sun is always shining and the air smells like warm root beer
And the towels are oh so fluffy
Where the shriners and the lepers play their ukuleles all day long
And anyone on the street will glady shave your back for a nickel

Wacka wacka doodoo yeah

Well, let me tell you, people, it wasn't long at all before my dream came true
Because the very next day, a local radio station had this contest
To see who could correctly guess the number of molecules in Leonard Nimoy's butt
I was off by three, but I still won the grand prize
That's right, a first class one-way ticket to

Albuquerque
Albuquerque

Oh yeah
You know, I'd never been on a real airplane before
And I gotta tell ya, it was really great
Except that I had to sit between two large Albanian women with excruciatingly severe body odor
And the little kid in back of me kept throwin' up the whole time
The flight attendants ran out of Dr. Pepper and salted peanuts
And the in-flight movie was Bio-Dome with Pauly Shore
And, oh yeah, three of the airplane engines burned out
And we went into a tailspin and crashed into a hillside
And the plane exploded in a giant fireball and everybody died
Except for me
You know why?

'Cause I had my tray table up
And my seat back in the full upright position
Had my tray table up
And my seat back in the full upright position
Had my tray table up
And my seat back in the full upright position

Ah ha ha ha
Ah ha ha
Ahhhh

So I crawled from the twisted, burnin' wreckage
I crawled on my hands and knees for three full days
Draggin' along my big leather suitcase and my garment bag
And my tenor saxophone and my twelve-pound bowling ball
And my lucky, lucky autographed glow-in-the-dark snorkel
But finally I arived at the world famous Albuquerque Holiday Inn
Where the towels are oh so fluffy
And you can eat your soup right out of the ashtrays if you wanna
It's OK, they're clean

Well, I checked into my room and I turned down the A/C
And I turned on the SpectraVision
And I'm just about to eat that little chocolate mint on my pillow
That I love so very, very much when suddenly, there's a knock on the door

Well now, who could that be?
I say "Who is it?"
No answer
"Who is it?"
There's no answer
"WHO IS IT?"
They're not sayin' anything

So, finally I go over and I open the door and just as I suspected
It's some big fat hermaphrodite with a Flock-Of-Seagulls haircut and only one nostril
Oh man, I hate it when I'm right
So anyway, he bursts into my room and he grabs my lucky snorkel
And I'm like "Hey, you can't have that"
"That snorkel's been just like a snorkel to me"
And he's like "Tough"
And I'm like "Give it"
And he's like "Make me"
And I'm like "'Kay"
So I grabbed his leg and he grabbed my esophagus
And I bit off his ear and he chewed off my eyebrows
And I took out his appendix and he gave me a colonic irrigation
Yes indeed, you better believe it
And somehow in the middle of it all, the phone got knocked off the hook
And twenty seconds later, I heard a farmiliar voice
And you know what it said?
I'll tell you what it said

It said
"If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again"
"If you need help, hang up and then dial your operator"
"If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again"
"If you need help, hang up and then dial your operator"

In Albuquerque
Albuquerque

Well, to cut a long story short, he got away with my snorkel
But I made a a solemn vow right then and there that I would not rest
I would not sleep for an instant until the one-nostrilled man was brought to justice
But first, I decided to buy some donuts

So I got in my car and I drove over to the donut shop
And I walked on up to the guy behind the counter
And he says "Yeah, what do ya want?"
I said "You got any glazed donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta glazed donuts"
I said "Well, you got any jelly donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta jelly donuts"
I said "You got any Bavarian cream-filled donuts?"
He said "No, we're outta Bavarian cream-filled donuts"
I said "You got any cinnamon rolls?"
He said "No, we're outta cinnamon rolls"
I said "You got any apple fritters?"
He said "No, we're outta apple fritters"
I said "You got any bear claws?"
He said "Wait a minute, I'll go check"
"No, we're outta bear claws"
I said "Well, in that case - in that case, what do you have?"
He says "All I got right now is this box of one dozen starving, crazed weasels"
I said "OK, I'll take that"

So he hands me the box and I open up the lid and the weasels jump out
And they immediately latch onto my face and start bitin' me all over
(rabid gnawing sounds)
Oh man, they were just going nuts
They were tearin' me apart
You know, I think it was just about that time that a little ditty started goin' through my head"
I believe it went a little something like this . . .

Doh
Get 'em off me
Get 'em off me
Oh
No, get 'em off, get 'em off
Oh, oh God, oh God
Oh, get 'em off me
Oh, oh God
Ah, (more screaming)

I ran out into the street with these flesh-eating weasels all over my face
Wavin' my arms all around and just runnin', runnin', runnin'
Like a constipated weiner dog
And as luck wouls have it, that's exactly when I ran into the girl of my dreams
Her name was Zelda
She was a caligraphy enthusiast with a slight overbite and hair the color of strained peaches
I'll never forget the first thing she said to me.
She said "Hey, you've got weasels on your face"

That's when I knew it was true love
We were inseperable after that
Aw, we ate together, we bathed together
We even shared the same piece of mint-flavored dental floss
The world was our burrito
So we got married and we bought us a house
And had two beautiful children - Nathaniel and Superfly
Oh, we were so very very very happy, aw yeah

But then one fateful night, Zelda said to me
She said "Sweetie pumpkin? Do you wanna join the Columbia Record Club?"
I said "Woah, hold on now, baby"
"I'm just not ready for that kinda commitment"
So we broke up and I never saw her again
But that's just the way things go

In Albuquerque
Albuquerque

Anyway, things really started lookin' upi for me
Because about a week later, I finally achieved my lifelong dream
That's right, I got me a part-time job at The Sizzler
I even made employee of the month after I put that grease fire out with my face
Aw yeah, everybody was pretty jealous of me after that
I was gettin' a lot of attitude

OK, like one time, I was out in the parking lot
Tryin' to remove my excess earwax with a golf pencil
When I see this guy Marty tryin' to carry a big ol' sofa up the stairs all by himself
So I, I say to him, I say "Hey, you want me to help you with that?"
And Marty, he just rolls his eyes and goes
"No, I want you to cut off my arms and legs with a chainsaw"

So I did

And then he gets all indignant on me
He's like "Hey man, I was just being sarcastic"
Well, that's just great
How was I supposed to know that?
I'm not a mind reader for cryin' out loud
Besides, now he's got a really cute nickname - Torso-Boy
So what's he complaining about?

Say, that reminds me of another amusing anecdote
This guy comes up to me on the street and says he hasn't had a bit in three days
Well, I knew what he meant
But just to be funny, I took a big bite out of his jugular vein
And he's yellin' and screamin' and bleeding all over
And I'm like "Hey, come on, don'tcha get it?"
But he just keeps rolling around on the sidewalk, bleeding, and screaming
(screaming sounds)
You know, just completely missing the irony of the whole situation
Man, some people just can't take a joke, you know?

Anyway, um, um, where was I?
Kinda lost my train of thought

Uh, well, uh, OK
Anyway I, I know it's kinda been a roundabout way of saying it
But I guess the whole point I'm tryin' to make here is

I hate sauerkraut

That's all I'm really tryin' to say
And, by the way, if one day you happen to wake up
And find yourself in an existential quandry
Full of loathing and self-doubt
And wracked with the pain and isolation of your pitiful meaningless existence
At least you can take a small bit of comfort in knowing that
Somewhere out there in this crazy mixed-up universe of ours
There's still a little place called

Albuquerque
Albuquerque
Albuquerque, Albuquerque
Albuquerque, Albuquerque
Albuquerque, Albuquerque
Albuquerque, Albuquerque

I said "A" (A)
"L" (L)
"B" (B)
"U" (U)
"querque" (querque)

Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque
Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque
Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque
Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque

Albuquerque

Turn it off already!

Super Bowl dreams? Not for Henson

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
By Bob Klapisch
Special to ESPN.com


TAMPA, Fla. -- Drew Henson won't bother to camouflage the truth. The former Michigan quarterback still experiences a rush of adrenaline every time he watches the NFL on TV, and the Super Bowl -- which provided a national stage for Tom Brady, his teammate with the Wolverines -- was in his blood this year.

Nevertheless, this Yankee-in-training says he's sticking to baseball. That means today, tomorrow and as far into the future as Henson can gaze. He won't be playing third base in the Bronx in 2002 -- at least not before the September callups -- but he still feels he made the right decision in choosing pinstripes over football.

Drew Henson
Third Base
New York Yankees
Profile


2001 SEASON STATISTICS - AAA
GM HR RBI OBP SLG AVG
71 11 38 .249 .367 .222



"I definitely know I'm in the right place, because now I can see the light at the end of the tunnel," Henson said the other day. "I'm finally starting to make the kind of progress that I wanted."

It hasn't been an entirely pleasant ride since Henson accepted the Yankees' six-year, $17 million contract last season, bolting his final year as Michigan quarterback and bypassing the NFL, where he could have been the No. 1 overall pick in this year's draft. The money officially severed Henson's bond with football, and in exchange, the Yankees believed they were inheriting the third baseman of the future -- a player projected to evolve into, say, Scott Rolen.

But at 6-5, 222 pounds, Henson discovered the size and muscle that served him so well on the gridiron didn't necessarily equate to grace on the baseball diamond -- specifically at third base, where Henson made 16 errors in 71 games last year at Triple-A Columbus. His performance at the plate was only slightly better; Henson batted just .222 with 11 homers in 270 at-bats and struck out 85 times.

The Yankees were relieved when Henson hit .314 in last year's Arizona Fall League, finishing in the league's top five in extra-base hits, slugging percentage and RBI. Still, the club realized it had probably rushed Henson too quickly in 2001 (he had played just 65 games at Double-A), and when Scott Brosius unexpectedly retired after the World Series, the Yankees were unanimously opposed to naming Henson as the immediate successor.

Instead, the Yankees completed a rare trade with the Mets for Robin Ventura, who's presumably just one year away from retirement, and will spend that time acting as third base's guardian. The Yankees are hopeful that by 2003, with another summer in the International League, Henson will finally be ready for his Bronx unveiling.

"His swing's gotten better, his plate discipline's gotten better, and his defense has gotten a lot better," said Mark Newman, the club's senior vice president for baseball operations. "He is very bright, and he's a quick study. The most stunning thing about him is how much he's improved with how little he's played."

The Yankees are certain of this much: Henson has the poise and maturity to handle New York's energy, perhaps the single greatest dividend of having played in front of huge crowds at Michigan. Henson learned years ago how to focus despite what he calls "the wall of noise" that 100,000 fans can create -- a skill that will come in handy at Yankee Stadium some day.


Henson threw for 2,146 yards and 18 TDs in 2000.

Still, Henson is humble enough to admit that baseball's subtleties can sometimes be overwhelming, even for a gifted two-sport star. For instance, Henson still has trouble staying sharp defensively if he goes several innings without a groundball, which is why he confesses, "This game can definitely humble you. One day you think you've got it figured out, and the next day, you can do everything wrong, like you've never played before."

For that reason, Henson has spent countless hours in camp with infield coach Willie Randolph and guest instructor Graig Nettles, the former Gold Glove third baseman. And when Henson needs advice in the batting cage, he can choose from several links to the Yankees' past, including Don Mattingly.

These perks are part of the psychological cushion that keeps Henson from having second thoughts about the NFL. He says "I've made up my mind" to become not just a Yankee, but an important Yankee, and there are moments when the club has such high hopes that Joe Torre admits, "We really don't even know what Drew's ceiling can be."

But that doesn't mean he's turned his back on football -- or at least, cut his connection with Brady, who was the Super Bowl MVP. Henson telephoned his former Michigan teammate -- they played together in 1998 and 1999 before Henson took over as starting QB in 2000 -- prior to and after the Patriots' victory over the Rams, offering congratulations to his friend.

Henson said "it was great to watch that game" but if he's even slightly envious of the louder, faster life Brady is now leading, he isn't showing it. Instead, Henson says, "All we do is talk about football, about the differences in the sports, things like that. Naturally, I'm interested what it's like in the NFL. I'm a fan, and always will be."

Enough to deliver one last, perfect spiral ... just for fun?

Henson shook his head and said he hasn't thrown a football in about a year. But he still has one at home, and with a smile, says, "I like to flip it around now and then."

Movies based on real life events are often made and whom would you cast as historical figures.

Vince Vaughn as John Dillinger
John Tuturro as Elliot Ness
Richard Dreyfus as older Son of Sam
Billy Bob Thorton as Ed Gein
Nixon- laugh it you might but Hedaya had the attitude and look in "Dick" though Hopkins gave a great performance in the Stone movie
Robin Williams- John Wayne Gacy just to give a film side to Patch Adams
James Norton- Jesse Timmendequas



Edited By IkeaBoy on Mar. 15 2002 at 4:07

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andrea yates was just sentenced to life in prison with the possibility of parole in 40 years. they should have drowned her instead.